Whether you’re loyal to your hot showers or are into the benefits of a cold shower, a dash under the water can definitely start your day off right, especially if you treat yourself with a shower gel or body wash (though perhaps not Dove’s body-shape options). However, for one unfortunate woman, her daily shower gel encounter turned into an absolute horror story that’s definitely a warning to us all.
Posted on the I Know, I Need to Stop Talking Facebook page, this story may leave you cringing and crossing your legs, but it’s also a helluva good cautionary tale. Our doomed heroine (oh yeah, she’s totally a heroine for giving us a heads up about the painful down-there sitch), tells us it was early in the morning when, “I stepped into my bath, and found that my usual, rather innocuous bottle of shower gel (Waitrose essentials in Rose) had run out. A tad irritating, but fortuitously, I had a solution close to hand. A brand new, unopened bottle of [Original Source] Mint and Tea Tree Shower Gel. My bodily cleanliness was assured once more. I breathed a sigh of relief.” But not for long.
After working the gel into a lather, she began washing her bod (though it seems NOT her bits directly) when she reveals, suddenly, “MY VAGINA WAS ABLAZE.”
“MY FLAPS WERE ON F*CKING FIRE.” Uh oh. “I frantically scrubbed my flaps, which by now felt as though they were being ceremoniously scrubbed by ants wearing ice skates laced with chili sauce.” OMG, so bad! Also, applause for the description that totally captures what such an unexpected fiery vag-related hell must be like. Thankfully, 12 hours later (!!!), her eyes stopped watering, her bits stopped burning, and she learned one heck of a lesson that she can now pass onto us all: Beware of vagina-unfriendly products.
And while it seems as if she’s not the only one who’s suffered such a fate (including a couple of unlucky fellas — “My husband and our son also made the mistake of applying it to their bobby danglers and let’s just say their golden balls shot back up inside their bodies and didn’t come out again for days!”), a comment left by Wren Foe added, “For the record, as someone who shares a bathroom with this blogger, I have never experienced a #PenisPyre equivalent. Original Source is my genital wash of choice and I’m happy to receive any complementary bottles.” Um, good to know?
Another FYI: The story-centered Original Source brand is UK based, so US bathers don’t need to be so worried. As for our friends across the ocean, BEWARE!
Have you ever made such an unfortunate mistake? Let us know @BritandCo!
(h/t Cosmopolitan; photo via Alexander Hassenstein/Getty)