As many opportunities as there are during winter to wear your cutest mittens and pom-pom hat combo or classiest kimono dress, there are equally as many chances to don seasonal sweaters so dorky not even your dowdiest aunt would wear them. As ugly holiday sweaters become increasingly popular, more online and in-store retailers have begun coming out with their own lines of these tacky monstrosities. Based on your zodiac sign, here is the one you should sport this season.
ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19)
Tipsy Elves Beer Pong Sweater ($69): Aries are competitive by nature. Spread the holiday cheer by cheering on your peers in this festive version of beer pong.
TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20)
33 Degrees Retro Reindeer Sequin Ugly Christmas Sweater ($35): Tauruses love the finer things in life. Show off your glamorous (and garish) side with this ultra-sequined holiday sweater.
GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20)
Tipsy Elves Naughty and Nice Two-Person Sweater ($78): Geminis, because of your dual nature, this sweater-for-two is the one for you. Grab your bestie or bae and team up for this year’s festivities. Only one question: Who’s naughty, and who’s nice?
CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22)
Tipsy Elves Gaudy Garland Cardigan ($65): All you artsy Cancers, this crafty-looking cardigan is the garment for you. Its homemade look gives you DIY-inspired charm without all the hard work.
LEO (JULY 23-AUGUST 22)
SilverSpoonLifestyle Light-Up Christmas Tree Sweater ($55): It takes Leo-level confidence to be able to roll into a holiday party rocking a sweater this gaudy. With the bells, tinsel, and lights, you’ll be hard to miss.
VIRGO (AUGUST 23-SEPTEMBER 22)
Tipsy Elves Stocking Stuffer Sweater ($65): Virgos are known for their practicality. This sweater-turned-wine-bag is the perfect way to be fashionable and functional all at once this season.
LIBRA (SEPTEMBER 23-OCTOBER 22)
Alex Stevens Circle of Life Sweater ($25): Libras are intellectuals themselves, so they like to make people think. We give you the most random holiday sweater there ever was, complete with allusions to The Lion King, the moon landing, Santa, and the Holy Family.
SCORPIO (OCTOBER 23-NOVEMBER 21)
33 Degrees #SquadGoals Sweater ($35): Scorpios are known for being great friends. Pay homage to your own homies with this #SquadGoals sweater. Plus, who doesn’t love a dabbing Dasher?
SAGITTARIUS (NOVEMBER 22-DECEMBER 21)
Well Worn Deck Yo’ Self Sweater ($28): If you’re a Sagittarius, you know the holidays are yours (okay, and Capricorn’s). This sassy sweater shows you’re not messing around while simultaneously incorporating your lovable sense of humor.
CAPRICORN (DECEMBER 22-JANUARY 19)
Festified Holiday Reindeer Sweater ($65): Capricorns are traditionalists, so stick to the basics this winter with this standard yet still tacky-in-its-own-right sweater.
AQUARIUS (JANUARY 20-FEBRUARY 18)
Uideazone Ugly Christmas Sweatshirt ($24): Those born under Aquarius are as unique as this holiday sweatshirt is hideous. Do what you do best and stand out at your holiday soirées with this graphic design nightmare.
PISCES (FEBRUARY 19-MARCH 20)
Tipsy Elves Drinking Game Sweater ($65): Pisces-born people are particularly social. Bring the partygoers to you and drink up with this bullseye of a sweater.
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