Melinda Gates Hopes to Help 96 Million Women Gain Access to Birth Control Over the Next 3 Years

1. Tips for safer sex practices.

There are several different ways to have sex — and everyone’s preferences are different. If you’re not comfortable engaging in certain practices, remember: you never, ever have to do anything you don’t feel comfortable with. Consent is key, and just because you've consented to one doesn't mean you've consented to all. We’re going to walk you through safe sex practices for a variety of ways to have sex, so you can make informed decisions that feel right for you.

1. Anal and vaginal sex

This type of sex has the highest risk of contracting an STI or HIV. If you’re having anal sex or vaginal sex, it’s important to use internal condoms or external condomsand a water-based or silicone-based lube. “Make sure that you use a different condom with each partner or when a penis or dildo/sex toy is moved between the vagina and anus,” healthcare company FOLX says. “Infections such as herpes, genital warts, syphilis, and monkeypox can be transmitted through regular skin-to-skin contact. Barrier methods such as condoms, dental dams, or latex gloves can reduce your risk of contracting these infections, but will only cover the protected area.”

2. Oral sex

Oral sex is when someone uses their mouth to stimulate the genitals of another person. With oral sex, there is a low risk of STI or HIV transmission, but it’s still possible to contract unwanted infections. “Using an external condom on a penis during oral sex can help contain body fluids such as semen, ejaculate and pre-ejaculate and reduce the risk of STI transmission,” says FOLX. “Condoms can also be used on a sex toy/dildo, especially if [you plan to use it] with multiple partners without proper cleaning.”

For transgender folks who recently underwent bottom surgery, avoid oral sex until you are fully healed. Anyone who has bleeding gums, mouth ulcers, a sore throat, or has gotten dental work done recently should also avoid oral sex.

3. Rimming

Rimming is when someone uses any function of their mouth around/in someone’s anus. According to FOLX, “this can function as a way to prepare for anal sex and/or as a fun, pleasurable sexual activity in its own right. Rimming has an extremely low risk for HIV, but it’s possible to get hepatitis A or bacterial infections like gonorrhea.” Reduce your risk by practicing good personal hygiene and using a barrier method like a dental dam, especially if you or your partner haven’t had a recent anal STI check.

4. Fingering

“Fingering is when someone uses their hand, finger, or multiple fingers to stimulate and penetrate their partner’s vagina and/or anus,” says FOLX. “Fingering is considered low-risk since there’s only a small chance of spreading an STI. There is a small chance that STIs can spread through fingering if you have any cuts on your hands or fingers, or if there are internal tears in the anus or vaginal tissues.” If you engage in fingering, reduce your risk by practicing good hygiene and washing your hands with soap and water, especially if you’re fingering multiple partners. You can also use latex gloves or finger condoms to cover your fingers for extra protection.

2. The lowdown on STIs.

STIs are sexually transmitted infections (AKA STDs or sexually transmitted diseases) and can be transmitted through different kinds of sexual activities. While there are dozens of unique types of STIs, common STIs to test for include gonorrhea, syphilis, chlamydia, trichomonas, and HIV. If you’re sexually active, it’s important to be tested for STIs, especially since you may have an infection or disease that doesn’t present any noticeable symptoms.

“If left untreated, STIs can cause serious health problems, including cervical cancer, liver disease, pelvic inflammatory disease (PID), infertility, and pregnancy problems,” says thewellproject. “Having some STIs (such as chancroid, herpes, syphilis, and trichomoniasis) can increase your risk of acquiring HIV if you are HIV-negative and are exposed to HIV. People living with HIV may also be at greater risk of getting or passing on other STIs.”

For more comprehensive information, visit thewellproject.

3. STI prevention and testing.

Luckily, there are plenty of ways for us to prevent the transmission of STIs. Many people request any intimate partners to be fully tested for STIs before engaging in sex with them, which is a great way to feel safe and comfortable during sex.

Obviously, anyone with a penis is advised to wear a condom during any form of sex, especially oral, vaginal, or anal. It’s a simple way to reduce the risk of both partners, which is a win for everyone. For women seeking oral sex or rimming, we recommend wearing Lorals, a FDA-cleared, wearable STI protection to keep both you and your partner safe.

Sex toys/dildos are another great way to reduce the transmission of STIs, but be sure to clean before switching between partners. When searching for the right sex toy(s), make sure they are made of body-safe materials, like medical-grade silicone. We love Bellesa’s line of sex toys because they are made from premium quality silicone, are waterproof and are USB rechargeable. Like they say, “good orgasms are a lifestyle!”

Remember: you need to test for STIs! Regularly! Fortunately, testing for STIs has (literally) never been easier. While you can be fully tested for STIs by your Primary Care Physician or OB/GYN, there are some great at-home tests if a doctor isn’t your jam. stix offers a range of vaginal and sexual test kits delivered straight to your door. We also love Cheeky Bonsai for at-home UTI testing and relief. Oh, and you can order both of these brands on Amazon. Talk about a win-win!

4. Different forms of birth control.

This ones for all the ladies out there. If you’re not looking to get pregnant now (or ever), then practicing safe sex is a MUST. If you are having sex with someone who has a penis, make sure they have a condom on. It’s seriously the simplest way to ensure there are no babies in your immediate future. In addition to condoms, birth control is the best way to ensure you’re as pregnancy-protected as possible.

You can read up on all of the different types of birth control here, and visit your OB/GYN to get started. If you don't have a doctor who can prescribe you birth control, try NURX or Hey Jane (they offer medical abortions, emergency contraception and UTI/yeast infection treatment too).

A morning-after pill (AKA emergency contraception) is another way to protect yourself against unwanted pregnancy, particularly if you believe your partner ejaculated in you during recent sex. Get fast, discreet emergency contraception delivered straight to your door with Julie, or head to your local CVS or Walmart if you simply cannot wait.

5. How to have pleasurable sex.

Pleasure looks different for everyone, but there are some resources you can reference for better sex. Practical Intimacy gives great advice on how to have incredible sex as a woman, but really, the tips are simple. Give yourself time to get aroused, engage your whole body and your mind, let go of the pressure to orgasm, ask for what you want and make sure your partner is seeking to please you, too. Sex should never be one-sided, and we should all seek to close the orgasm gap, one mind-blowing orgasm at a time.

If you need tips on where to start, we highly recommend watching Angel Ardito’s TikToks. Her tips are informative, practical, and sure to make you (and your partner) much happier people.

And remember: you are way sexier than you think! Negative self-talk deserves no place in your mind or your bedroom, so get it out of there!

You Want To Test Your Fertility

Natalist

Natalist is “led by a team of moms and doctors on a mission to reduce the historical shame, misinformation, and outdated product offerings women experience on their path to parenthood. Inspired by [their] own complex fertility journeys, Natalist offers fertility, pregnancy, and postpartum essentials that are science-backed and designed with sustainability in mind.”

Beyond their product offerings (like pregnancy tests, ovulation test kits, male care and supplements), Natalist offers an incredibly thoughtful and thorough blog for anyone interested in parenthood (or anyone in the trenches of it 😂).

​You Need Simple Reproductive Health Tests

bird&be

bird&be is on a mission to assist, coach, fuel, and cheer you on throughout your fertility journey. With a variety of offerings for male and female fertility care, bird&be is a great place for any future American and Canadian parents to start.

​You *Think* You May Have An UTI

Cheeky Bonsai

Cheeky Bonsai was founded because of a desire to make everyday health feel like selfcare. With a Harvard Urogynecologist backing up their selection of UTI care and treatments, Cheeky Bonsai is an effective way to alleviate (and test for) any potential UTIs.

​You Need Emergency Contraception, Like, Now

Julie

Julie is a new healthcare company helping people prevent unwanted or mistimed pregnancies with an FDA-approved morning after pill. When taken within 72 hours of having sex, it can help prevent pregnancy by temporarily delaying or stopping ovulation.

​You Want To Test Your Sexual And Vaginal Health

stix

​You Need *Intimate* Care

wisp

Wisp offers healthcare on your terms — with products to treat a variety of conditions. Whether you need a quick prescription or a trusted over-the-counter remedy, wisp connects you with real-time providers and guides to help you safely navigate your symptoms and get back on track.

You’re Looking For Comprehensive Healthcare As An LGBTQ+ Person

FOLX

If you’re a member of the LGBTQ+ community, then you’re well aware of the barriers to comprehensive care within the traditional healthcare system. FOLX is designed for “everybody and every body,'' with a focus on providing quality, specialized healthcare to fit your specific needs. Whether you’re looking for primary care, gender-affirming care, sexual and reproductive care, or something else, they offer plans for both insured and uninsured people as well as an amazing library of info on *literally* any issue you can think of.

​You Want To Add Some (Discreet) Pleasure To Your Life

Bellesa Boutique

Bellesa is on a mission to close the pleasure gap. Through a wide range of five-star sex toys made with 100% body-safe premium materials, Bellesa empowers their community to embrace, explore and celebrate their sexuality. Unapologetically.

Mistakes We Never Made by Hannah Brown (May 7)

Emma Townsend and Finn Hughes are involved in a classic cat and mouse situationship that's turned incredibly sour. They went from inching their way towards several romantic turning points to deciding they actually don't like each other anymore. One can assume their hearts got tired of being shown that almost doesn't count.

However, they have to put on their adult undies to get through a wedding weekend where everyone's expected to be on their best behavior because of the joyous moment at hand. It sounds too good to be true and the pair quickly realizes it is when the bride-to-be vanishes.

Forced to race against an invisible winding clock, Emma and Finn embark on a momentous journey to figure out if this wedding can actually be saved. Somewhere along the lines, they begin to remember what it was like when their undeniable attraction towards each other led to much more. Maybe a weird wedding mystery is just the thing they needed to prove that it's time to make things official.

The Ministry of Time by Kaliane Bradley (May 7)

The Ministry of Time is a the modern time travel book you didn't know you needed to read until now. It shines a light on a young woman — aka the "bridge" — who's new job comes with a hefty salary and more responsibility than she considered. She's meant to help an expat called "1847," or Commander Graham Gore, adjust to living in a modern world when all he remembers is what it was like to live in the 1840s.

The more 1847 adjusts to life around him with other expats and this young woman whose so different than what he's used to, the more the bridge crosses the lines and allows herself to become immersed in his world beyond what her profession calls for.

This isn't without consequences and it's up to the bridge to decide what it really means to live in the future.

The Five Year Lie by Sarina Bowen (May 7)

Ariel Cafferty was head over heels in love with a man she thought she knew until it feels like he ghosted her without an explanation. She thought she was beginning to move on, but a vague text from him (Drew) years later brings back emotions she's tried to forget.

Suddenly Ariel begins to piece together clues that something is seriously wrong. Not only that, she can't shake the feeling that the truth is still being kept from her. In order to possibly save her and her son's life, she'll have to work to understand what happened to Drew and how far the mystery surrounding his disappearance actually goes.

Alternate Endings by Ali Rosen (May 7)

Alternate Endings is one of the new books releasing in May that I immediately connected to because I can relate to some aspects of Beatrice Leal's life. She's a working mother who's as dedicated to her son as she is to her job, but the only difference between us is that she's dealing with a tough divorce. To make it even more complicated, her boss also gets divorced and decides she wants to live in Ireland full-time.

This means she's requiring the team — including Bea — to be there twice a month and this throws a huge monkey wrench in the custody plans she and her ex-husband Lucas have half-heartedly agreed on. Still, Bea loves her job and reluctantly makes the first trip to Ireland where she meets the new CTO at her job — the sexy Jack Sander who ghosted her while they were in high school.

Despite the two decades that have passed since they've seen each other, there's no denying that the two still have electric energy that they acknowledge during one of their trips to Ireland. But as time passes, the lie they keep telling themselves gives way to something more and Bea finds that she may just have to change her approach to everything in life — especially when it comes to love.

The Paradise Problem by Christine Lauren (May 14)

Is it obvious that my favorite new books I've read involve some form of love? Besides this amazing cover that caught my eye, The Paradise Problem offers a completely new approach to being married that I've seen in a book.

Anna Green is impulsive and makes decisions solely so she survive from day to day. It's the main reason she married Liam "West" Weston when she needed a place to stay. It was supposed to be a marriage of convenience between two strangers. So when she doesn't bother looking at the "divorce" papers he had her sign and is surprised to find out they're still married when he visits her years later, Anna's more than flustered.

See, West is set to inherit a large fortune attached to his family's name and has to prove that he's been enjoying married life with his wife Anna. The problem is that they don't really know anything about each other and his family is demanding to see her.

With no other choice, West convinces Anna to keep up the married act and prays she'll be able to impress his family. However, he begins to realize that maybe he's had it wrong all along. Maybe he's supposed to fall in love with this feisty, art-loving, impulsive woman that's stealing his heart. Maybe he's supposed to protect hers.

Lovers and Liars by Amanda Eyre Ward (May 14)

The Peacock sisters aren't as close as they used to be and they have time and a lot of heartache to blame for that. Of course, there's always the roles they played in the fallout of their familial relationship.

Sylvie Peacock finds herself facing marriage again after being widowed and she thinks it might be time to move on. Cleo Peacock is the successful sister who can do no wrong and has the cushy lifestyle to prove it. So when her sister Sylvie falls for the charming Simon Rampling, her criminal defense intuition starts ringing. And Emma Peacock? Well, she's hiding secrets that's turned her into a woman who lets silence lead her. At the center of the sisters is their less than stellar mother who's domineering presence makes it clear these sisters have cowered in her presence for far too long.

One weekend will change everything for the Peacock family and nothing will be the same. — good or bad.

The Honey Witch by Sydney J. Shields (May 14)

Marigold Claude is ever popular with the many men who want to court her, but she couldn't care less. Her freedom lies in the nature and she gladly revels in it. Things seem to get even better when her grandmother feels she's worthy to become a Honey Witch. But, she can never fall in love.

Deciding she's okay with this rule, she carries on merrily until she meets Lottie Burke, someone who doesn't think magic exists. Intending to prove Lottie wrong, Marigold starts doing things out that feel out of character for her. Soon, something must darker presents itself and Marigold finds that she may have to break multiple rules just to save what she cares about.

One Perfect Couple by Ruth Ware (May 21)

Lyla is experiencing one bad situation after the another. From research that's gone awry to a relationship that's gotten off track, she feels like she's almost at the end of her rope. Suddenly it seems like her prayers are answered when she and Nico are given a chance to be on the TV show One Perfect Couple to win a grand prize that could help them out financially.

They're pit against four other couples and being to sense that something is horribly wrong when disaster strikes the minute they set foot on the deserted island where they're meant to compete. One Perfect Couple becomes more than a reality show and involves whether people can actually survive or not.

Goddess of the River by Vaishnavi Patel (May 21)

Ganga went from being a carefree goddess of the river to a mortal after she failed to control the godlings near her. With no other choice, she decides to become a queen after marrying King Shantanu so she can prove that she's worth of being a goddess again. While she is granted freedom, she can't bring the son she bore in her human form with her.

Once Prince Devavrata gets older and decides he doesn't want to take his father's place, he finds himself on a journey that puts him lock and step with his mother Ganga.

Swiped by L.M. Chilton (May 21)

What would you do if all of your dates from Tinder, Hinge, or Bumble ended up dead after you'd last seen them? Swiped helps Gwen Turner answer that very question when she's thrown into the wildest predicament of her life.

First thing's first — she's in a terrible rut and can't figure out how to put the pieces of her life back together again. She feels hopeless in the romantic department and has to contend with the fact that maybe leaving a great job to serve coffee might not have been the smartest decision.

So, she decides to download a dating app and goes on a series of dates that leave her more confused than ever. To make matters worse, they begin to turn up dead after she's been the last person to go on a date with them. This doesn't bode well with the police and she soon finds herself being carefully watched.

The more frequently things begin to happen, the more Gwen rushes to figure out who the date killer is. As she gets closer to finding out the truth, she'll find that she also has to contend with a dark secret that she thought no one else knew about.

I Hope This Finds You Well by Natalie Sue (May 21)

Not to be confused with Dolly Parton's "Jolene," I Hope This Finds You Well's main character of the same name finds herself in a work bind when HR sentences her to "sensitivity training." Her crime? Being exposed for sharing her negative opinions about co-workers. Restricted from certain interactions, Jolene decides to do whatever it takes to get through her training period.

So when an IT plunder allows her to see what everyone else has been privately talking about, Jolene feels conflicted about whether to report them or not. She even discovers that potential layoffs are about to affect her job so she does everything she can to make sure her role is secured.

Soon she'll have to decide what's more important: her job or the truth.