The Hoodwitch Explains How To Use Magic In Your Everyday Life

The 2 New Love Languages

Shared Experiences

If you’re the kind of person who can’t help but send out a shared calendar for you and your partner (Or even your friends!), this may be the love language for you. Shared experiences is all about creating deep-rooted bonds, which differs from quality time, as QT focuses on new, intentional experiences. As it turns out, 38% of survey participants ranked shared experiences #1, noting that they prefer to love and give love by creating shared memories with their significant other.

Signs This Might Be Your Love Language:

• You’re always down for a group project.
• You prefer having someone join you on your weekly Target trip rather than go alone.
• You feel closer to your partner after going to Book Club together.
• Making new memories is your ideal way to spend time.
• You’d rather be doing something with your partner than sitting on the couch.

Emotional Security

If you'd rather have deep pillowtalk than Netflix and chill with your S.O., then your love language might be emotional security. Rooted in conversation, emotional security happens when a person feels safe, seen and secure for being their authentic self. Typically, people who crave emotional security want to extract the why during conversations – AKA they tend to dig a bit deeper than surface level. If this sounds like you, once your partner starts asking (and answering) the “whys,” you probably feel a stronger connection.

Signs This Might Be Your Love Language:

• You feel closest to your partner when they share their dreams, fears and past.
• You like asking a lot of questions. Like a lot.
• You think deeply and listen intentionally.
• The “scary” conversations don’t scare you at all.
• You don’t mind sharing how you feel, even if it’s awkward.

If these don’t hit home, though, maybe your love language(s) is one of the OG options. Keep reading for a quick breakdown of the five initial love languages (that are still very relevant today).

The 5 Original Love Languages

Words of Affirmation

People with this love language value verbal acknowledgments of affection, including frequent "I love you's," compliments, words of appreciation, verbal encouragement, and even digital communication like texting and social media engagement.

Quality Time

If you’re all about QT, then you feel the most adored when your partner actively wants to spend time with you. These people particularly love when active listening, eye contact and full presence are prioritized in the relationship.

Receiving Gifts

This one is pretty straightforward: you feel loved when people give you visual symbols of love. Often confused with materialism, it’s not about the extravagance of the gift at all, but rather the symbolic thought behind the item. People with this style recognize and value the gift-giving process: the careful reflection, the deliberate choosing of the object to represent the relationship, and the emotional benefits from receiving the present.

Acts of Service

If your love language is acts of service, you value when your partner goes out of their way to make your life easier. Little things like making you coffee in the morning, starting your car in the winter so it heats up or doing the laundry unprompted.

Physical Touch

People with physical touch as their love language feel loved when they receive physical signs of affection, including kissing, holding hands, cuddling and sex. Physical intimacy and touch can be incredibly affirming and serve as a powerful emotional connector for people with this love language.

Sex Toy Tips For Flying Solo

We’re no stranger to the fact that owning your own pleasure in front of a partner can honestly be pretty scary – which is why we (and Fine) recommend starting with a little alone time. 😏

“Exploring something alone is the safest way you can explore anything. Think of it like trying on an outfit and seeing if it looks good on you first versus just walking out of the house,” Fine offers. “Out of all the things to try that are new, trying a sex toy is relatively risk-free – you can try it by yourself in privacy and it’s an important part of self-exploration.”

Masturbating with a toy (whether it’s a vibrator, dildo, or another preferred piece) can help you get real familiar with what you like — and don’t like — for yourself. Tapping deeper into those feelings will also help you build confidence with your own sexuality, so when (and if) you’re curious about trying sex toys with your partner, you can be prepared to approach the situation with suave.

“Self-pleasure for women isn’t just important for sexual wellness, but physical and mental health as well. Understanding your own body is an important part of self-care and self-connection,” Fine says. “Masturbating can be a form of self-love, and the act of learning to enjoy your own body and figuring out what feels pleasurable for you can even boost your self-esteem.”

How To Use Sex Toys With A Partner

According to Fine, incorporating sex toys into partnered sex allows you to spice things up, have longer sex, reduce pain, and even lead to more sex. More than anything, it can increase your chances of achieving orgasm, which can be very satisfying when you take the pleasure gap into account.

As with any new factor in the bedroom, it’s important to maintain open communication with your partner to ensure they’re on-board with the idea. Since some people can feel intimidated (or potentially replaced) by sex toys, it might be a good bet to pitch the idea with both parties' pleasure in mind.

“It could be helpful to tell your partner about how positive you can see your sex life becoming, or that you see parts of that currently,” Fine suggests. “You can talk about how using a vibrator can take your pleasure to the next level, and add something new and different without making them feel like you are replacing them.”

Men sometimes feel pressure to perform during sex. Incorporating sex toys could help alleviate some of the pressure, allowing for much more steamier, sexier, and more enjoyable sex. This could be another great talking point to bring up with your partner. Plus, we bet it’s just as satisfying for them to watch you climax as it is for you to do it.

Toys aside, good sex (and masturbation!) have tons of benefits like lower blood pressure, improved sleep, a boosted immune system, and a stronger pelvic floor. Toys are just a tool and an added bonus that can help you get there – literally.

The Best Sex Toys For Beginners

Dame Dip

This toy keeps things simple and sleek – plus it's approachable, perfect for starting your exploration. This vibe can be used internally and externally.

The Demi Wand by Bellesa

This vibrating wand is top-rated for being beginner-friendly, but will still be just as effective once you've mastered the art of sex toys. It gets its power from a convenient power cord, plus it can be submerged under water if bath time is meant for you time.

Dame Fin Finger Vibrator

This vibe fits perfectly on two fingers – whether it be your own or a partner's, this sex toy will keep the fun coming. 😉

SKYN Tremble Remote-Controlled Bullet Vibrator

This toy's vibrating settings can be controlled by a remote for either yourself or your partner to use. It's also very affordable, fits in your pocket, and is rechargeable for up to a whole hour of runtime.

Maude Spot Vibrator

Toys with different vibrating settings offer a nice change in pace, which can give each sexy session a good refresh. This pick can be used internally or externally – it's compatible with water-based lubricants plus the two-hour runtime won't let any distractions get in the way of your pleasure.

Dame Eva Hands-Free Vibrator

This unique sex toy is designed to be hands-free, taking the cumbersome task of holding a toy in place away entirely. That way, you can tune in on the moment and just feel good.

Je Joue Rabbit Bullet Vibrator

This toy has quite the cheeky design, with two flexible rabbit ears that can move in any which way. It's meant to be played with!

Why do I always have stomach issues when traveling?

Routine can benefit our mental health, but it also benefits our physical health, too! "Stomach problems tend to flare up while traveling because our usual routines, like mealtimes and sleep patterns, get thrown off, which can disrupt digestion," Simpson says. "Plus, not drinking enough water and trying new foods or eating at odd hours can make matters worse by dehydrating us and upsetting our stomachs.

"Travel anxiety significantly affects our stomachs," she continues. "When we're anxious, our bodies release stress hormones that can disrupt digestion, potentially worsening existing gastrointestinal problems or causing new ones."

And it turns out, flying itself can also affect your gut physically. "Flying or changes in altitude can make your stomach uncomfortable by making the gas in your intestines expand, causing bloating," Simpson says. "Also, the difference in cabin pressure and oxygen levels can dehydrate you, which might worsen digestion and existing stomach problems."

How do you fix travelers stomach?

While travel day stomach problems can take you by surprise, there are a few you can do in the moment to help ease discomfort. "As a traveler with a colon disease and dietary restrictions, I always have Tylenol and digestive enzymes on hand," Tanner says. "Whenever I arrive at my destination, I try to locate the nearest juice/smoothie place to maintain the daily habits that make me feel my best at home."

"I usually bring Dramamine with me just in case I experience a rare bout of nausea, and I've recently been taking 1 teaspoon of digestive bitters before meals to help with heartburn (cute, right?) — they come in really small bottles so they're generally fine to go through security," Storck says. "The day before a long flight, I try to eat whole non-processed foods — nothing that could upset my stomach — and lots of water. I try not to drink on the plane if my stomach feels sensitive (otherwise, a glass of red helps me sleep!)"

You'll also want to be aware of dehydration on your travel day (dehydration makes everything feel worse), and that includes what kind of water you're drinking. "For those with sensitive stomachs, it's a good idea to go for bottled or filtered water while traveling because tap water safety can differ from place to place," Simpson says. "Opting for bottled water helps lower the chance of drinking contaminated water and reduces the risk of health problems."

"It's smart to be careful when sampling new foods while traveling to prevent stomach issues," Simpson continues. "Stick to dishes you're familiar with and that are fully-cooked, and avoid street food in places where cleanliness might be a concern. Also, keep an eye out for any potential allergens or foods that might not agree with you."

How to make travel easier?

Your travel day should actually start before you wake up. Just like meal prepping can set you up for an easy week of eats, travel prepping can ensure your day-of journey goes as smooth as possible. While you can't control flight delays or traffic, there are a few things you can add into your routine.

"Include stress-relief techniques in your plan and feel reassured that you have strategies in place to prevent travel-related anxiety from causing stomach issues," Simpson says. Try our Best Breathing Techniques and Daily Journal Prompts when you have a moment to spare!

"I definitely pack the day before and try to make my carry-on bag really organized (for example, I put all my chargers in a small pouch so that there aren't wires getting tangled, I pack snacks so that I don't have to spend a ton of money at the airport, etc.)," Storck says. "I also download shows or movies on to my iPad beforehand (or pack a good book) — I like having something to look forward to if it's a long flight! Simple things, but they help the day go smoothly."

"I try to plan in advance as much as possible to alleviate travel prep and travel day stress [and] I make a list of items I want to pack on my phone," Tanner says. In addition to packing plenty of snacks that are easy on her stomach, she also figures out what to eat when she gets to her location. "Depending on my flight time, I will pick up a Sweetgreen salad to eat on the plane to keep me satiated and full of greens until I can find my next whole foods meal."

Should I pack anything specific to avoid stomach problems?

It's a good idea to have natural remedies or over the counter medicine in the event you need to ease bloating or discomfort (think antidiarrheals, laxatives, or antacids). "Bring along essentials like enteric-coated peppermint oil capsules or activated charcoal tablets for bloating and discomfort, antacids for heartburn and acid reflux, and magnesium citrate or magnesium oxide supplements if you're prone to constipation," Simpson says.

"You might also want to pack dandelion or fennel tea for digestive support and hydration tablets or powders to prevent dehydration, especially in hot climates," she continues. "Just remember to check in with a healthcare professional before trying any new remedies, especially if you have existing health conditions or are taking medications."

And to make the travel in and of itself more enjoyable, Storck has a few travel must-haves: "Headphones, comfortable clothing (big fan of black leggings, sneakers and a sweater; I'll never be a fancy plane outfit girl) and my water bottle." Tanner's must-haves include a portable phone charger, headphones, eye patches, and sunscreen.

How to eat in moderation on vacation?

We're big fans of Little Treat Culture at Brit + Co, especially if you're somewhere you've never been before. I mean, how could you visit Paris and NOT buy pastries?! Even if you have a sensitive stomach, Simpson says it's okay to indulge — as long as it's in moderation.

"Indulge in local delicacies moderately, savoring each bite and paying attention to your body's hunger and fullness signals," Simpson recommends. "Include plenty of fruits and vegetables in your meals to offset any extra calories from treats and to keep you feeling full and satisfied. Also, incorporate physical activities into your plans to burn off any additional calories consumed from indulgences."

"To avoid stomach issues while traveling, steer clear of spicy, fatty, and greasy foods," Simpson continues. "Additionally, limit alcohol, caffeine, and carbonated drinks, and ensure fruits and vegetables are thoroughly washed to prevent food-related illnesses. Lastly, maintain regular meal times to prevent overeating and refrain from skipping meals."

If you do deal with the dreaded traveler's stomach (it happens to us all!) swap your fancy meals for a few tried-and-true foods. "If you're dealing with stomach issues while traveling, stick to gentle foods like bananas, rice, applesauce, and toast to soothe discomfort, and steer clear of foods that might worsen your symptoms," Simpson says. "Keep yourself hydrated, take time to rest and recuperate, and try relaxation methods like deep breathing or meditation to ease stress-related digestive problems. If your symptoms persist or become severe, don't hesitate to seek medical help."