Sweat in Style in These Fashionable Fitness Finds

Cool leggings

Bikini season may be soon behind us and gyms may be closed due to COVID, but working out never goes out of style. Whether you're getting your pedal, pushup, plank, or pigeon pose on, we found some really good athleisure to make you *feel* that much better doing it. Ahead you'll find some very fashionable finds to keep you sweating, lounging, and looking good.

Onzie Mudra Bra ($52) and Animal Foil Midi Legging ($76)

Gymshark Camo Seamless Sports Bra ($45) and Camo Seamless Leggings ($60)

P.E. Side Runner Jacket ($260)

Essential Seamless Layer Bra ($75) and Captain Ankle Tight ($110)


This article has been updated from a previous post.

Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.

A capsule wardrobe should be super timeless and dependable enough that you won’t dream of ditching the pieces you have in a year or so. This is all about longevity, people!

Since summer’s on its way (and I fear the heat is here to stay for a while), it’s time to start developing a stylish collection of summer clothes that you truly want to wear. Plus, ones that’ll help you survive the painfully warm weather.

My rule of thumb for building a great capsule wardrobe (for summer and any season, really) is starting with the most basic of basics. For instance, I typically lean towards solid pieces (without any patterns) in neutral colors, like black, white, brown, or cream. Another important factor for my personal style is comfort – you want to make sure you enjoy wearing each and every piece you have. Having garments without any extra bells or whistles in your closet means you’re more likely to reach for them, plus they’ll wear quite well with additional basic pieces.

Don’t feel pressured to find all these pieces in a single thrift trip. Oftentimes, it takes multiple thrifting sessions to gather exactly what you’re looking for, especially for a reliable capsule wardrobe. But that’s the fun in thrifting for me – you never know what you’re going to find!

Here are 18 summer capsule wardrobe items to keep an eye out for on your next thrift store visit!

Tops

Photo by Dmitriy Steinke / PEXELS

White Tee

Any white tee is deserving of your summer uniform. They go wonderfully with denim and linen bottoms, and pretty much anything in between. Thrift for your staple white tee in whatever silhouette suits your style. For me, I prefer a cropped baby tee, but you may see yourself wearing a boxier, longer fit based on your preferences.

My best advice here is to avoid see-through white t-shirts at all costs. Since thrift stores typically have older styles and fabrications in stock (they truly don't make things like they used to!), your search shouldn't be too hard. Go for the thicker materials and make sure to try 'em on before sealing the deal.

White Tank Top

For the non-tee days, white tank tops are a godsend. They're the perfect base to layer under light button-ups or cardigans for summertime when needed.

Again, avoid anything that's not giving full coverage. I like my tank tops to be form-fitting (and compatible when I don't feel like wearing a bra), but you may reach for something looser. Either way, make sure you really jive with it!

Photo by Anna Nekrashevich / PEXELS

Black Tee

Because black is just as versatile as white, having a basic black t-shirt on-hand will work wonders for your capsule wardrobe and save you time when you're getting dressed for the day.

Any solid black tee is gonna match with denim bottoms like shorts, skirts, or jeans, as well as summer-ready white pants or shorts.

As always, comfort and coverage is key.

Photo by Leah Newhouse / PEXELS

Black Tank Top

You can also layer black tanks pretty easily. For any tank top you're adding to your capsule wardrobe, I might recommend styles with wider straps rather than spaghetti straps. This way, the garment will fit more comfortably and last longer than any style with flimsy straps.

Photo by Meredith Holser

Colorful Going Out Top

It's hot girl summer after all. You'll want something hot to step out in for happy hours and dinner dates!

Whether it's a halter tank, a top with a tie-front, or a cheeky open back shirt, the most important aspect to consider when adding a going out top to your capsule wardrobe is that you see yourself wearing it again and again – perhaps in different ways from the next!

Photo by Meredith Holser

Buttoned Top

Buttoned tops are good to have as a light layer for when the sun goes down in the summer. For the warmer weather, I recommend searching the thrift racks for cotton or linen fabrications – they are superior for being breezy and breathable, which is what you want in the hot temps.

Basic whites, blacks, or other neutral colors like taupe or sand are an easy addition for building on top of other solid pieces (remember that white tank top?). If you wanna mix things up a bit, look for undistracting patterns like minimal stripes or dots in neutral colorways (so you can still pair it with the rest of your capsule).

Bottoms

Denim Shorts

High waisted denim shorts are just as popular as longer bermuda jorts right now, so the particular style you thrift for is really up to you. No matter what, you want to prioritize comfort and quality, along with your personal preferences. Try to put micro-trends aside!

For thrifting denim, I like looking for brands like Lee or Levi's. I typically like to feel the material in my hands, making sure it's thick and has zero holes, thinning, or rips.

Boxer Shorts

Boxer shorts are hugeee for this summer, but they have longevity for outfits in and out of the house – beyond summer, too. These flowy shorts are super light and airy, and you can literally can hop out of bed and look chic when you pair 'em with a basic tank, light cardi or button up, and ballet flats.

It sounds icky, but you're most likely to find the boxer shorts you're looking for in the men's section of the thrift store. I'd look out for fun patterns like plaids or stripes, but also basic solid colors like light blues or grays. From there, you wanna wash everything you thrift before wearing (you may already know the drill, but it's worth the reminder)!

Track Shorts

Track shorts are also popping off right now, but they can live in your wardrobe forever. With some cute sneaks and a basic tee, your next casual outfit is set. Track shorts can be dressed up or down with ease, depending on how you style them, and they're great for working out too . Hot girl walks, here you come!

Linen Pants

Any sort of linen garment is gonna do you extremely good this summer.

Linen pants are a great option to have in your capsule wardrobe for the summer nights you might have to dress up a bit more than usual, – office lunches, cocktails with the girls, etc. They are so easy to wear with a tank and chic flip flops for a beachy look, or layer with a light cardi and ballet flats for a sophisticated ensemble.

White or cream colors are super cute for linen pants, but you should be able to track some down in essentially any color you wish!

Dresses + Skirts

Photo by Meredith Holser

Black Mini Skirt

It might just be me, but I think you're gonna want something short for a hot, hot summer. Mini skirts are here to save the day, and you can track them down at the thrift store pretty easily!

Black is an instant match with just about anything, and I've found myself reaching for my thrifted black mini skirt more than usual as things start to heat up.

Even better than a skirt? A skort. With skorts, you have more comfort and security. To scour the racks for skorts, I typically look around the athletic wear section.

Denim Mini Skirt

Again, the mini length is so helpful for tackling summer heat. Denim is timeless as can be, and a denim skirt can be worn in countless ways! Go for the cowgirl chic look with some cowgirl boots and a pointelle tank, or go cute-girl with some slingbacks and a going out top!

The denim mini skirt you land on all depends on your personal style and preferences for fit. I personally have an affection for medium-wash denim, but you might prefer darker colors. The denim skirt I always reach for is easy to put on with a simple zipper and button closure, but you might be able to find a piece that slides right on and stretches.

Casual Little Black Dress

It's worth repeating: black goes with everything! Whether it's a-line, a swing dress, or a babydoll look, a casual LBD is perfect for summertime. It's easy to wear with tall boots, sandals, flats, etc., plus you can dress it up or down based on what you're up to!

Remember, comfort is key.

White Maxi Skirt

A white maxi skirt delivers such whimsical vibes! It's my go-to summer farmer's market get-up since I don't have to deal with pants at all. But the white maxi skirt works for a variety of situations like brunch or park walks, too!

It's a great match with a black tank top or breezy bandeau, if the temps are really scorching.

Shoes

Ballet Flats

Ballet flats (or even Mary Janes) are a reliable cozy shoe for wearing this summer and beyond! Unlike sneakers or clogs, they won't leave your feet super sweaty – which is something I try to avoid at all costs.

They're perfectly femme, so cute, and go with everything from pants to dress.

Photo by Roman Odintsov / PEXELS

Comfy Sandals

If ballet flats aren't your vibe (for style or comfort reasons), sandals are another breezy choice you can track down at the thrift store. It's best to opt for ones with a substantial sole, so you can be sure your feet are getting as much support as possible.

Looking for lightly-used shoes are best when thrifting.

Accessories

Photo by Addy Bronzzz / PEXELS

Basic Shoulder Bag

You gotta take stuff with ya wherever you go this summer! A small shoulder bag is perfect for toting things around, from the cafes to the bars. I adore my small black shoulder bag since it goes with everything, and looks even better when I'm wearing black shoes.

If a small shoulder bag isn't roomy enough for your lifestyle, a canvas tote is great, too.

Photo by Meredith Holser

Black Sunnies

Keep those eyes protected and those 'fits looking super cool with some chic sunnies!

Thrift stores often have vintage-y glasses, so this is a great opportunity for finding something unique rather than spending too much $$$ on something new!

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Lead photo by Polina Tankilevitch / PEXELS.

As tons of Memorial Day sales begin to ramp up, Amazon's deals have already started – super early. There are tons of savings to take advantage of for the holiday on all sorts of categories, from tech to home goods. Since we're still a ways out from Memorial Day, we're highlighting only the best early deals you can shop right now. Scroll for more from the Amazon Memorial Day sale!

When is Amazon's Memorial Day sale in 2024?

Photo by cottonbro studio / PEXELS

Memorial Day is May 27 this year, but Amazon's sale has already started a few weeks in advance. As we get closer to the holiday, we'll start to see more deals develop.

What deals does Amazon's Memorial Day sale have?

Photo by Kindel Media / PEXELS

Amazon's Memorial Day sale has deals on everything from headphones, TVs, vacuums, kitchen appliances, home goods like sheets and towels, and many more practical items.

Beats Studio Pro Bluetooth Headphones

49% off

You'll save about $170 when you shop these noise-cancelling headphones on Amazon right now. Here's to more focused work days and fuss-free flights!

Apple AirPods (2nd Generation)

38% off

If you just can't ditch your music (or fave podcast) when you're on the go, AirPods are a saving grace. If you snag 'em from Amazon now, you'll save about $50!

iRobot Roomba 694 Robot Vacuum

35% off

This smart vac does all the work for you, which, if you ask us, is totally worth the investment. This early Amazon Memorial Day deal saves you $95 dollars on the fancy-schmancy cleaning machine.

KitchenAid Artisan Series 5 Quart Tilt Head Stand Mixer

27% off

This deal will make you wanna whip something up in the kitchen, ASAP. It's currently 27% off, which means you save a whopping $150! You can be sure that this KitchenAid stand mixer is uber-durable and easy to use with 10 different speeds for exactly what you need.

Signature Design by Ashley Queen Size Chime 12 Inch Medium Firm Memory Foam Mattress

22% off

Memorial Day weekend is *the* time to pick up a mattress if you've been wanting an upgrade. before you shop anywhere else, check out Amazon's sale, because it has amazing deals like this one: save $75 total, spending just $275 for a totally brand-new queen mattress!

Ulike Laser Hair Removal IPL Device

21% off

This hair removal device is the perfect personal tech to get your hands on ahead of summertime. It's completely painless but oh-so effective, providing results in just 3 weeks. Save $70 now! Vacation is calling!

Lane Linen 100% Organic Cotton Twin Sheets Set

20% off

Time for a bed refresh? You can snag this complete sheet set in a slew of different colors for about $26.

Chita Oversized Modular Sectional Fabric Sofa Set

18% off

You'd never guess this luxe-looking couch is from Amazon. With the Memorial Day sale, save $265 on your way to a dreamy living room upgrade.

Apple AirPods Max Wireless Over-Ear Headphones

18% off

If the Memorial Day weekend deals are screaming "treat yourself," opt for these Apple headphones that'll really show your wired ones who's boss.

Cosori TurboBlaze Air Fryer

17% off

If there's one thing we absolutely need in our kitchen, it's an air fryer! Luckily, this fan-favorite model is on deal for just $100 (you save $20 total), so you can cook up some amazing air fryer recipes.

Levoit Large Air Purifier

16% off

Up your at-home game with this air purifier made for large spaces. It's meant to filter out all the dirt, dust, and odor, so you can lounge around and sleep with the cleanest inside air possible. Save $30 now!

Peloton Bike

13% off

It's never too late to get on your fitness grind, and the Peloton bike is downright addicting since you can keep it at home and work out whenever you want. It's an investment, but you'll save about $200 when you purchase it now!

Subscribe to our newsletter to shop more Memorial Day sales!

Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.

All I’ve been able to focus on as of late is my summer outfits. And as much as I love a denim shorts and graphic tee combo, dresses just make the whole shebang so much easier.

These Old Navy dresses make getting ready for hot summer days a total breeze – a one-and-done, if you will! The retailer is doing some super buzzy stuff with their current styles, so you can be sure your warm weather look will be on trend, too.

We’re talking lotsa linen. We’re talking adorable gingham prints. The current lineup of Old Navy dresses even includes strappier styles that look downright iconic in the summer sun. Scroll on for 14 top-tier summer dresses you can snag for such a good price!

Fit & Flare Linen-Blend Mini Dress

Starting off strong with this sexy strapless number! This linen mini lets you look super chic without exerting too much effort. It goes on easy and stays secure with a smocked stretchy bodice, while the skirt stays straight and breezy. This pick earns even more bonus points for having *pockets*!

The Fit & Flare Linen-Blend Mini Dress comes in 4 other summer-ready colors and regular sizes XS-4X, tall sizes XS-XXL, and petite sizes XS-XXL for $35.

Sleeveless Linen-Blend Mini Dress in 'Blue Gingham'

Gingham is undoubtedly a cool fashion girl staple, so it's a must to work into your summer wardrobe this year. This gorgeous linen-blend mini dress makes perfect use of the pattern in a serene blue and white combo that's easy to pair with any type of summer shoe or light layer. The wide straps and smocked back keep the top half of this style in check, so you can move around comfortably.

The Sleeveless Linen-Blend Mini Dress in 'Blue Gingham' comes in 5 other colorways in regular sizes XS-4X, tall sizes XS-XXL, and petite sizes XS-XXL for $35.

Fit & Flare Cami Mini Dress

When life gives you lemons (AKA a good weather day), wear bright colors! You'll be reaching for this cheery mini dress every time the sun's shining. The cami-inspired top is made to hug your figure, while the short skirt allows for some breathing room. The adjustable spaghetti straps and elastic smocked bodice help you find the comfiest fit possible.

The Fit & Flare Cami Mini Dress comes in 12 other playful colors in regular sizes XS-4X, tall sizes XS-XXL, and petite sizes XS-XXL for $20 (on sale for a limited time, was $35).

Sleeveless Crochet Midi Dress

This crochet get-up is the coolest way to channel your California surfer girl summer fantasy. The woven textures and details intertwined in this midi dress perfectly recall 70's vibes. The v-neck makes way for you to get some more sun, all while feeling light and breezy, thanks to the airy cotton yarn construction. The midsection features a more open, see-through design to break up the monotony.

The Sleeveless Crochet Midi Dress also comes in black and is shoppable in regular sizes XS-4X, tall sizes XS-XXL, and petite sizes XS-XXL for $50.

Fit & Flare Sleeveless Midi Dress

Time to feel CUTE! The sweetheart neckline amps up the femme vibes of this midi dress, and it's the perfect thing for summertime soirees and outdoor adventures. The straps on this adorable lil' number aren't adjustable, though the back to smocked with a stretchy material that snugly hugs your bust. This dress' hem hits around the calf, and this color in particular flaunts a playful eyelet layer with a slip underneath for coverage.

The Fit & Flare Sleeveless Midi Dress is shoppable in 9 other colors in regular sizes XS-4X, tall sizes XS-XXL, and petite sizes XS-XXL for $35 (on sale for a limited time, was $50).

Fit & Flare Smocked Midi Dress

This bold blue will turn all the heads your way this summer! It'd also make for a stellar swimsuit cover-up since it's made to be loose-fitting and light when you wear it. The top is all the way stretchy, as the straps and bodice move with you with a smocked material.

The Fit & Flare Smocked Midi Dress comes in 2 other color options in regular sizes XS-4X, tall sizes XS-XXL, and petite sizes XS-XXL for $24 (on sale for a limited time, was $40).

Short-Sleeve Mini Shirt Dress

Think of this piece like an elevated polo dress. It's got the collar and the buttons, but this time, it's more loose-fitting and free-flowing. This soft twill shirt dress even flaunts pockets on both sides along the seams. The wide, vented design means you get constant airflow, keeping you cool as a cucumber in the summer heat.

The Short-Sleeve Mini Shirt Dress comes in 3 more colors in regular sizes XS-4X, tall sizes XS-XXL, and petite sizes XS-XXL for $28 (was $40).

Waist-Defined Midi Dress

This Old Navy dress is oh-so romantic. The buttons that line the length of the dress, alongside a pair of gorgeous flutter sleeves, make for an elegant look without sacrificing comfort one bit. This pick is easy to pull on and just as easy to take off. You'll appreciate that the shirred front shapes and sculpts your figure without restricting your movement.

The Waist-Defined Midi Dress comes in 3 other colors and patterns in regular sizes XS-4X, tall sizes XS-XXL, and petite sizes XS-XXL for $45.

Sleeveless Linen-Blend Mini Dress in 'Lemons'

This colorful print is the one to wear for summer vacations. It's got illustrations of lemons, leaves, flowers, and other fruits in all sorts of different colors for a lively feel. It's very easy-fitting and doesn't require any extra bits or bobs like zippers or clasps. Wear it easily with your fave trendy sneakers or you go-to summer sandals to complete the look.

The Sleeveless Linen-Blend Mini Dress is shoppable in 5 other colors in regular sizes XS-4X, tall sizes XS-XXL, and petite sizes XS-XXL for $35.

Sleeveless Racerback Maxi Dress

We all need a maxi in our lives, and luckily, this one is peak comfort. It's made from a stretchy ribbed knit fabric comprised of 40% cotton and 38% polyester, so it fits against your figure quite nicely. It boasts a high neckline (hello, coverage!) and a high leg slit for extra sexiness.

The Sleeveless Racerback Maxi Dress comes in 2 other colors in regular sizes XS-4X, tall sizes XS-XXL, and petite sizes XS-XXL for $15 (on sale for a limited time, was $40).

Cloud+ Strappy Athletic Dress

If you're on the sportier side, this athletic dress is gonna become your new summer uniform. The moisture-wicking fabric keeps the vibes light and cool, no matter what you're up to. It stays on snugly with the help of built-in spandex shorts and secure, stretchy crossback straps.

In addition to this dark blue color, the Cloud+ Strappy Athletic Dress comes in gray, peach, black, and lilac. You can shop it in regular sizes XS-4X, tall sizes XS-XXL, and petite sizes XS-XXL for $40.

Sleeveless Mini Swing Dress

Your next date night dress: found. This adorable polka dot ensemble has a playful v-neck, spaghetti straps, and a mini cut for the moments you might want to show more skin. Its 100% cotton construction means it's gonna be super breathable, and the limited color palette ensures you'll find something to style it with very easily.

The Sleeveless Mini Swing Dress is also shoppable in blue and black in regular sizes XS-4X, tall sizes XS-XXL, and petite sizes XS-XXL for $15 (on sale for a limited time, was $30).

Fit & Flare Strappy Mini Dress

For the days where you just can't bear to put on some pants, this mini dress saves the day. It wears unbelievably light with a short length and tons of straps on the open back. The empire waist sits higher than your actual waistline to give your look a flattering elongated effect.

The Fit & Flare Strappy Mini Dress comes in 7 different colors in regular sizes XS-4X, tall sizes XS-XXL, and petite sizes XS-XXL for $15 (on sale for a limited time, was $30).

Fit & Flare Rib-Knit Maxi Dress

This long dress makes we want to be on a tropical island somewhere, sipping away at a fruit smoothie with my toes in the sand. It's made of a thick ribbed knit material that feels loungey and flowy at the same time. It's rid of any zippers, buttons, or clasps to save you time when getting ready – but you'll still look very put-together in this neutral style.

The Fit & Flare Rib-Knit Maxi Dress comes in 4 other colors and is shoppable in regular sizes XS-4X, tall sizes XS-XXL, and petite sizes XS-XXL for $40.

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Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.

Images via Old Navy.

Last season of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, we all speculated that Kyle Richards swapped one Mo for another given her separation from Mauricio Umansky and budding friendship with Morgan Wade. While Richards was tight lipped throughout each episode, we learned a lot more from Buying Beverly Hills and tabloids alike, featuring more definitive timelines and theories about what was really going on at home with the Richards-Umansky family. Now, with Mauricio reportedly fully moved out and Morgan allegedly out of the picture, what's left for Real Housewives of Beverly Hills season 14? Here's a breakdown of everything we know, from returning cast members, remaining couples, and more.

Who's returning to "Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" for season 14?

Images via Bravo

There aren't any official announcements about the returning cast yet, but there are plenty of stories out there about who's not returning — and who's potentially getting demoted!

First up is Dorit Kemsley. Dorit's been on the show a while now, gabbing and girling with Kyle Richard throughout the latter half of the show's history — but there's been a wrench in that relationship ever since Kyle befriended Morgan Wade. And now, The Daily Mail exclusively reported that Dorit may even get demoted to "friend of the show" after not being fully truthful about the state of her relationship with husband PK Kemsley — more on that in a moment. Kyle Richards "dismissed" these reports, but we'll have to see about that. Fingers crossed she and Kyle can mend things...and that she and the producers can as well!

Next, we've gotta address Anne Marie Wiley. Anne Marie was let go from the show after just one season — where we can't help but giggle at the journey from calling herself a literal doctor to finally addressing that she's actually a nurse — and is allegedly okay with it. She told Peoplethat she's "in a great space" since then, so...good for you, girl! Just maybe don't obsess over someone's esophagus in your next foray into the film and TV world.

A regular for the last three season, Crystal Kung Minkoff is also not returning to the RHOBH world, according to Deadline. She noted on Instagram how heavy it was to carry "the weight" of being the first — and only — Asian American woman to join the RHOBH cast. Her presence and thoughtful opinions will definitely be missed!

For now, we can only assume that Kyle Richards, Garcelle Beauvais, Erika Jayne, Dorit Kemsley, and Sutton Stracke will make a return, but only time — and tabloids — will tell!

Will any new cast members join "Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" season 14?

Image via NBC

Apparently Melanie Griffith, known for starring in projects like Working Girl, is joining the RHOBH crew for season 14, according to In Touch Weekly! She's a long-time friend to Kyle Richards, and I think that'll add a great dynamic...especially given how rocky things got between Kyle and Dorit last year. The girl needs friends now more than ever!

One of the sillier rumored cast situations is that Chelsea Handler was joining the show. The hilarious comedian quickly shut that down, however.

A person we don't think will ever return as a main cast member, friend, or otherwise? Miss upside down jacket herself, Denise Richards. 🤭

Who's still a couple on "Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" right now?

Image via Netflix

That's a very, very good question! Kyle and Mauricio are definitely broken up, and seemingly for good. The only other remaining couple was Dorit and PK, but that's all changing quickly. In April, The Daily Mailreported that PK's living in the Beverly Hills Hotel at the moment. Now, Dorit officially posted an update about their relationship on Instagram. It says:

"We as a couple have been subject to a lot of speculation about our marriage. We have had our struggles over the last few years and continue to work through them as two people who love each other and share two amazing children together. To safeguard our deep friendship and maintain a harmonious environment for our children we have made the mutual and difficult decision to take some time apart and reevaluate our relationship while we prioritize our children. We appreciate your love and support while we continue to do the work necessary throughout this journey. With love, Dorit and PK"

Comments poured in from fans and fellow housewives alike. Lisa Rinna commented, "I love you ❤️," followed by Kathy Hilton and Anne Marie Wiley's prayer hands and heart emojis. While this doesn't necessarily spell out divorce, it doesn't look great for the longtime couple. All in all, I'm hoping for a healthy outcome for the whole family!

When will "Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" season 14 air?

Image via Bravo

There's no set air date for Real Housewives of Beverly Hills season 14, but I'd have to guess that we'll see these ladies (and whoever else joins them) by sometime in 2025.

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Header image via NBCUniversal Media

I used to think being in a healthy relationship meant that things would be easy peasy, but I now know it takes more than "I love yous" to learn how to be a good partner — especially when dealing with mental health. Since it's Mental Health Awareness Month, I figure it's the perfect time to talk about how neurodivergence can show up in relationships — particularly when you're married to or dating someone with ADHD — and why it doesn't have to spell doom.

That's not to say that things like financial red flags or a serial messy partner are things you have to deal with — it's more about realizing what your personal thresholds are while loving someone who perceives things a little differently.

However, sometimes while you're navigating those relationship boundaries on your own, other people's opinions can cloud your perception. Licensed therapist Natalie Rosado, LMHC, of Tampa Bay Counselingand Counseling with Natalie says, "Unfortunately, there are numerous stigmas that can affect how people view these relationships, making dating more challenging." But with over a decade of experiencing helping clients learn to take care of their mental health, Natalie has a few tips that'll help you learn how to be a good partner to someone who has ADHD.

What are common misconceptions about neurodivergence in relationships?

Image via Yan Krukau/Pexels

It seems like as soon as people find out two people are dating, their relationship becomes THE topic of conversation among their peers and otherwise. I know because I'm guilty of letting my curiosity get the best of me, but I try not to make assumptions about what goes on BTS. Knowing this, I can only imagine some of the things that people say about couples where one partner has a diagnosed mental illness or is neurodivergent.

Natalie says the common myths and stigmas associated with these types of relationships are:

  • Relationships with people who have mental health issues are doomed to fail.
  • People with mental health issues are violent and dangerous.
  • Mental health problems are a sign of weakness, and you can 'fix' your partner.
  • You should only consider someone as a romantic partner if they are 'cured' of their mental illness

How can someone effectively communicate with their partner if they ADHD?

Image via Viktoria Slowikowska/Pexels

Someone who has ADHD may process things a little differently than another person, which doesn't have to be a terrible thing. To be more specific, Natalie breaks down how someone can have conversations with a partner who has ADHD. "Effective communication with a partner who has ADHD requires specific strategies because ADHD can affect a person's ability to focus, organize thoughts, listen actively, and manage impulses, which can sometimes make interactions and day-to-day living difficult," she says.

A few ways to navigate this is by doing the following:

  • Seek Understanding of ADHD: Understanding how ADHD can affect communication and behavior can help you develop empathy and more effective strategies tailored to your relationship.
  • Establish Eye Contact: Making eye contact can help them focus and signal that the conversation is important.
  • Check for Understanding: After you’ve communicated something important, ask your partner to repeat back what they've understood. This can ensure that your message has been understood correctly.
  • Use "I" Statements: This can prevent your partner from feeling defensive and keeps the conversation more constructive.

How can you recognize signs that something is triggering your partner?

Photo by cottonbro studio/PEXELS

This is such an important question because sometimes we're not aware that something we're doing or saying is triggering our partners whether they have ADHD or not. Natalie says, "A clear sign that something may be triggering your partner is a noticeable and abrupt change in their mood or behavior," and "Triggers can also provoke physical responses."

Based on her experience, these physical responses can include shaking, trembling, a sudden inability to speak, crying, rapid breathing, or even a panic attack. "Observing these changes can indicate that your partner is experiencing something deeply distressing. If your partner suddenly withdraws from a conversation, shuts down emotionally, or tries to leave the situation entirely, it might indicate that they are feeling overwhelmed or triggered, as well. Or a sudden silence or unusually passive communication can be a sign your partner is triggered," Natalie says.

As someone who's known for finding a way to exit a conversation if I start feeling overwhelmed, I can say that this sounds all too familiar.

What makes having a partner with ADHD difficult? Should that be a dealbreaker?

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Deal breakers are subjective, so no one can firmly tell you what you should or shouldn't deal with. At the same time, Natalie wants you to consider some things. "Dating someone with ADHD does have it's unique challenges, but understanding these challenges can help determine whether they might be considered deal-breakers, depending on one's personal limits, the dynamics of the relationship, and the willingness of both partners to work through these concerns."

She makes it clear that some things that may affect your relationship with your partner are their tendency to be inconsistent, distracted, forgetful, and disorganized. If you're finding that it's hard for you to find peace at home or in your relationship, it may be best for you to amicably part ways with your partner.

How can you support a partner with ADHD?

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We're fortunate that we live in a time where talking about mental illness and neurodivergence is more widely embraced, but that doesn't mean everyone is comfortable with the conversation. Natalie says, "As a clinical provider, I have been able to witness first hand the ways that a partner's support can really assist someone with an ADHD diagnosis. First, understanding the symptoms, challenges, and behaviors associated with ADHD can help you empathize with what your loved one is experiencing."

A few of the ways you can help your partner is by listening without judgment or interruption, and acknowledging their struggles, validating their feelings, and reassuring them that it’s okay to feel overwhelmed. Natalie says this "...can help provide a feeling of safety" while "Offering to help organize their environment, set up reminders, or plan daily schedules can help reduce stress and make daily tasks more manageable."

To go the extra mile, Natalie suggests celebrating small milestones and successes to boost their self-esteem and motivation since these two things can also be affected by ADHD.

If you're struggling while dating someone who has ADHD, just know that all relationships hit roadblocks here and there. The best thing you can do is ask yourself what you're honestly able to handle in a relationship, consider finding ways to effectively communicate with and affirm your partner, or decide to walk away.

For more mental health advice, be sure to check out our interview with Mandy Teefey of Wondermind!

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