It’s hard to complain about a fabulous Valentine’s Day breakfast in bed or a romantic Netflix marathon, but when it comes to the routine sappy shenanigans and mushy clichés, there are more than a handful of us who would gladly pass on Valentine’s Day. If you or your significant other aren’t feeling a connection with February 14, odds are you’re having a tough time finding the perfect card that says you love them and you know them. Not to worry. These 14 Valentine’s Day cards are made precisely for your Valentine’s Day-hating partner and will have you well on your way to celebrating in true anti-Valentine’s fashion.
1. Diamond Donatella You Get a Card Greeting Card ($6): Ever feel like Valentine’s Day cards are so ubiquitous they deserve their own meme? This Diamond Donatella card does too.
2. RowHouse14 Funny Valentine’s Day Card ($5): If you can hear your significant other gag every time they hear the word “bae” on television, this card is a definite winner. Plus, since it’s handmade, it supports local artisan makers instead of big corporations. Double win!
3. Paper Pony Co. Valentine Shmalentine Anti-Valentine Card ($5+): This card literally says what your anti-Valentine’s Day partner is thinking. The holiday may be overrated, but you’re not!
4. RowHouse14 Anti-Valentine Card Singles ($5): Give this card if your partner has a sense of humor, or be prepared to spend February 14 alone. You’ve been warned.
5. Blackbird Letterpress Glad We’re in This Together Card ($5): It’s true, sometimes Valentine’s Day feels like The Walking Dead: Couples Edition. But as long as you’ve got each other, you’ll probably make it out semi-alive.
6. Tay Ham Obsessed Card ($5): Chocolates, flowers and a romantic meal? Spoken by a true romantic herself: “Why are you so obsessed with me?”
7. The Good Twin Co. Stuck on You Card ($5): Even when you try to be sweet on this forced day of romance, it comes out a little gross. Eh, at least the sentiment is still there.
8. Tay Ham Shorty Wanna Ride Notecard ($5): Your love might fill a novel, but this February 14, your anti-Valentine’s Day boo would love it if you just kept it short.
9. RowHouse14 Valentine Card ($5): No matter how you feel about Valentine’s Day, there’s one standard cliché that’s actually pretty awesome. Let them know how much you love them (and chocolate) with this cheeky anti-Valentine’s Day card.
10. Ilootpaperie You’re Unique Card ($5+): Want a Valentine’s Day card that shows you care about your partner without all the cheesy red hearts and roses? This dancing unicorn is here for you.
11. Julie Ann Art I Love You Card ($5+): Any poop face emoji will love this crass anti-Valentine’s Day card by Julie Ann Art.
12. Tay Ham Head Over Heels Card ($5): It’s hard having a Valentine’s-hating partner, but just like this punny Tay Ham card, you can always twerk it out.
13. OfficeGangsta Attack of the Valentines Zombies Greeting Card ($4): This movie poster-turned-adorable anti-Valentine’s Day card is perfect for the zombie lover in your life. Pair it with a Dawn of the Dead binge and you’re all set for a great February 14.
14. Papyrus Mushy Stuff Letterpress ($6): Show your partner you love them like the calendar says you have to with this ultra-cheeky letterpress from Marcel Schurman.
How are you spending February 14 with your anti-Valentine’s Day significant other? Tweet us at @BritandCo.