As Bachelor Nation watches Colton Underwood look for love on season 23 of The Bachelor, he’s looking back on his past relationships and reflecting on what he calls his first love and worst heartbreak.

“I wouldn’t say [my worst breakup] was on the show,” Underwood revealed on the latest episode of the LadyGang podcast. “I would say it was my first love.” He then told hosts Keltie Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jac Vanek that he was referring to Olympic gymnast Aly Raisman.

Underwood and Raisman dated from approximately December 2016 to June 2017, even appearing on the 2017 Golden Globes red carpet together. The Bachelor star first asked Raisman on a date via a video stunt arranged by some mutual friends, putting extra attention on their public relationship from the get-go. Their romance made headlines again when Underwood appeared on Becca Kufrin’s season of The Bachelorette in early 2018.

“While it was confusing and it was hard in the beginning, it also taught me a lot about myself, what I need, what I want, what I can do better in a relationship,” Underwood told LadyGang of his split from Raisman, adding that the experience made him a better person. “It was a big step for me. It was really tough.”

As Underwood’s season of The Bachelor continues to air on ABC, the leading man won’t divulge if he’s currently in a relationship, or if season 23 ends in an engagement, for fear of ruining the “journey” with spoilers. “But I will say,” he previously told The Hollywood Reporter, “I’m exactly where I need to be in my life right now.”

Are you surprised to hear about Colton’s worst heartbreak? Let us know @BritandCo.

(photo via Frazer Harrison/Getty Images)