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Problematic Message: Love is the most exciting when it’s forbidden.

Even if you haven’t seen the romantic comedy, you’ve definitely seen the GIFs: Andrew Lincoln, playing Mark, professing his love for Keira Knightley’s character through handwritten signs, one of which reads the famous line, “To me, you are perfect.” Yes, it’s ultra-romantic — until you look a little closer. “Although we all love an honest display of love, making a play and expressing your love for your best friend’s wife is not a good start for a relationship, on or off screen,” Tcharkhoutian says.

And the most harmful part of these fictional narratives is that they only show a fraction, if any, of the fallout. “This is a toxic dynamic that devalues the dignity of marriage and romanticizes the idea of being in love with someone who is ‘off-limits,’ without portraying the harsh realities of this kind of basis for a relationship,” Tcharkhoutian explains.

Problematic Message: A relationship that began with ulterior motives can become healthy and functional.

There’s no denying that Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey are a dreamy pair, but in this movie, their relationship is a nightmare. Their quick rise to love is certainly entertaining, but the foundation of their relationship makes it impossible to exist outside of fiction.

The two meet as means to prove themselves at their respective jobs, and in true rom-com fashion, their supposedly real feelings take off from there. Tcharkhoutian cautions against this behavior in real life. “This can set up a relationship to be something in which a person is objectified as a vehicle to help you meet your needs, instead of a mutual union and partnership with pure and honest motives of loving each other through thick and thin,” she says.

Lucy and Jack in "While You Were Sleeping"

Problematic Message: Falling in love with the idea of someone can result in a happy ending.

No one can resist a Sandra Bullock romantic comedy, so it’s no surprise this movie is still revered as a classic of the genre. It has all the necessary components: an unrealistic plot (she saves a man’s life, is confused for his fiancée by his family, and then falls in love with his brother while he’s in a coma — like, come on!), a handsome boy-next-door lead and, of course, love. However, much like the relationship in How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, the foundation is faulty.

Falling in love with the idea of someone, as Sandra Bullock’s character does, doesn’t equate to falling in love with the actual person, Tcharkhoutian clarifies, and to start a relationship with this basis in real life is ill-advised.

Problematic Message: True love lies in the next adventure, which is far from your hometown and your past relationship.

Who hasn’t dreamt of traveling to a foreign country; staying in a cozy, remote cottage; and falling in love with someone even half as good-looking as Jude Law? Well, there’s a reason it’s a mere fantasy. Tcharkhoutian describes the phenomenon in The Holiday movie as escapism — the idea that you need to escape from your day-to-day life to find true happiness or, in this case, true love.

Although it’s fun to dream, if taken too far, this particular romantic comedy mentality can lead to irrational expectations. “This escapism mentality can create a false belief that international [relationships] are sustainable in the long-term,” Tcharkhoutian remarks. “True healthy relationships survive and thrive in the everyday, mundane routine, not in the exciting international adventure that depends on thrill and distance.”

Which rom-com couples stay together?

However, there are PLENTY of romantic comedy relationships we love! Some of our favorites include Nick and Rachel in Crazy Rich Asians, Matty and Jenna in 13 Going on 30, Harry and Sally in Meg Ryan's When Harry Met Sally, Elle and Emmett in Legally Blonde, and Peter and Lara Jean in To All The Boys I've Loved Before.

This power couple is quite literally on top of the world right now, and I feel like I'm watching a rom-com IRL. Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce made their relationship public in September of 2023, and it definitely feels like invisible string theory.

The Hollywood power duo met in 2010 on the set of Green Lantern and they married soon after in 2012. Today, Blake and Ryan share four daughters.

Barack Obama and Michelle Obama

The former POTUS and FLOTUS met back in 1989, when Michelle was assigned as Barack's mentor at their law firm. Reportedly, Barack (then 28) was instantly smitten with Michelle (then 25), and they began dating shortly after. The couple was married in 1992, eventually welcoming daughters Sasha and Malia.

This private couple met on the set of The Place Beyond the Pines in 2011 and today have two daughters together. Eva and Ryan are so private, in fact, that news of their marriage only came to light in 2022 following the reveal of Eva’s newest tattoo, which reads “de Gosling.”

George and Amal were introduced by a mutual friend at a 2013 dinner party in Lake Como. After a few months, the couple went on their first date, and were engaged within a year. The pair wed in 2014 and have since welcomed twins.

Emily Blunt and John Krasinski

The A Quiet Place costars initially met in 2008, tying the knot in an Italian ceremony in 2010. The actors are parents to two daughters, Hazel and Violet. Our favorite fact about them? John’s seen in The Devil Wears Prada 72 times.

If there's any couple that makes me believe in falling in love with your best friend, it's Tom Holland and Zendaya. The two actors met while making Spider-Man: Homecoming, and the rest is history.

David Beckham and Victoria Beckham

The Beckhams met in 1997 and were married by 1999. Today they have four children together: Brooklyn, Romeo, Cruz and Harper.

While the timeline of their romantic relationship is unknown, the singers have been friends for well over a decade. They officially confirmed their relationship in 2020, and as of 2023 are reportedly married. The pair share one son and are expecting a second child by August.

Serena Williams and Alexis Ohanian

The tennis legend and Reddit co-founder met by chance when they both sat down next to each other during breakfast at the Cavalieri Hotel in Rome back in 2015. They hit it off and were married in 2017, welcoming their daughter Olympia shortly after.

Emma Stone met her husband Dave McCary when she hosted Saturday Night Live in 2016. They were married by 2020 and now have a baby girl together named Louise Jean McCary!

Hayley Kiyoko and Becca Tilley

The pop singer and two-time Bachelor contestant have been together for five years, and confirmed their relationship in 2022.

Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban

The Australian actor and New Zealand singer met at the G’Day USA gala in 2005 and got married in 2006. Today, the duo are parents to two daughters, Sunday Rose and Faith Margaret, in addition to Nicole’s two children with former beau Tom Cruise.

Viola Davis and Julius Tennon

The How To Get Away With Murder actress has been married to her husband Julius since 2003.

Gabrielle Union and Dwyane Wade

According to Dwayne, the two met at a 2007 Super Bowl party which they were both asked to co-host. Although it wasn’t love at first sight, the couple eventually married in 2014. They share one daughter, in addition to three children from Dwayne’s previous relationship.

Oprah Winfrey and Stedman Graham

Oprah began dating Stedman in 1986, the same year her namesake show launched. After meeting at a charity event, the pair were engaged in 1992, but decided against marriage.

This celebrity couple reportedly began dating in 2018, and (after totally slaying the Met Gala red carpet), they learned they were expecting their first child in 2023!

Alicia Keys and Swizz Beatz

The singer and producer have known each other since they were teenagers, but didn't enter a relationship with each other until 2008, with Swiss proposing in 2009. The couple married in 2010 and they have two sons named Egypt and Genesis together.

Cindy Crawford and Rande Gerber

The supermodel married the businessman and former model in 1998. They have two children together, Kaia and Presley — both of whom are successful models too.

Matthew McConaughey and Camila Alves

After six years of dating, the couple married in 2012 in Texas. Today, the model and actor have three children together.

While this celebrity couple met in 2017, they didn't become an item until 2021. And we're *very* excited to see them tie the knot soon. Good things come to those who wait!

Chrissy Teigen and John Legend

The fan favorite couple met in 2007 on the set of his music video and married in 2013. They share four children, welcoming their youngest via surrogate earlier this month.

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka

Neil and David started dating in 2004 and married in 2014. The couple became fathers to twins, Harper and Gideon, in 2010.

TheO.C. and Gossip Girl alumni are believed to have met in 2010 while starring in romantic comedy The Oranges. They married in 2014 and have a daughter and a son.

Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck

Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck *totally* make me believe in fate. After breaking off their engagement in 2023, the celebrity couple finally got married in 2022. I'm not crying, you are!

Kevin Jonas and Danielle Jonas

The eldest Jonas brother Kevin married Danielle in 2009 after two years of dating. The couple has two daughters, Alena and Valentina, and are very close to the rest of Kevin’s family., Danielle’s regularly seen backstage and in videos with her “Jonas sisters,” Priyanka Chopra (married to Nick Jonas) and Sophie Turner (married to Joe Jonas).

Judd Apatow and Leslie Mann

The comedic director and actress have been together since 1996, and have been married since marrying in 1997. The couple regularly work together on films and have two children, Maude and Iris. Maude is following in her parent's footsteps, having had a breakout role in the hit MAX teen drama Euphoria.

After getting married in 2022, Kourtney Kardashian just gave birth to her and Travis Barker's son, Rocky Thirteen Barker, in December 2023. Congrats to the happy family!

Julia Roberts and Daniel Mode

Julia and Daniel married in 2002 after meeting during the filming of The Mexican, where Julia starred alongside Brad Pitt. They have three children together, now 18 (twins) and 16.

It appears Chris Martin and Dakota Johnson have been together since 2017 (which means he probably has the real inside scoop on that iconic Architectural Digest house tour), and they might be tying the knot very soon!

Denzel Washington and Pauletta Washington

The actors have been married for a whopping 37 years after tying the knot in 1983. They renewed their vows in 1995, and are parents to four children, John David, Malcolm, Olivia and Katia.

Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell

The couple have been together for 40(!!!) years, ever since 1983. While they never married, they share one son, Wyatt Russell. Goldie also has two children, Kate Hudson (yes, THE Kate Hudson) and Oliver Hudson, whom she shares with her second husband, Bill Hudson.

Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick

SJP and Matthew had a surprise wedding in 1997 after meeting on the New York theater scene in 1991. The pair have three children together, James Wilkie and twin daughters Marion Loretta and Tabitha Hodge.

Elton John and David Furnish

The world renowned musician and Furnish met in 1993 and were one of the first same-sex couples to enter a civil partnership (the closest thing to a same-sex marriage at the time) in the UK in 2005. “Officially” marrying in 2014, they share two sons together.

Dua Lipa and Callum Turner

This celebrity couple were first spotted at the beginning of 2024, and I genuinely might have screamed when I found out. Dua Lipa's recent albums are a masterclass in pop music, while Callum Turner automatically makes every TV show and movie he's in better. I can't wait to see what's in store for these two!

May 2024

Real Americans by Rachel Khong

Real Americans is a beautiful story about identity, class, and more in America. It begins with Lily Chen falling in love with Matthew despite their different backgrounds. She's dealing with being an unpaid intern who's the child of someone who escaped Mao's Cultural Revolution while Matthew is the heir of a successful pharmaceutical company. Nevertheless, they somehow manage to fit together.

But, something happens in between the time they fall in love and the moment Lily's son Nick realizes his mom seems to be keeping something from him. She's never talked about his father and this has only piqued his curiosity even more.

The more he tries to find answers about his dad, the more Nick realizes there's not always a clear path to the past.

April 2024

The Husbands by Holly Gramazio

What if you came home from work one day to discover you're married to a stranger and everyone knows but you? That's exactly what happens to Lauren and it confuses her because she's sure she'd remember getting married. Not only that, but she's apparently been married for a while. Everyone in her life knows and the life around her shows evidence that her marriage isn't a fluke. So why can't she remember it?

The answer to her question lies in the mysterious act that occurs in the attic. For some reason, it's become a place where she 'receives' new husbands and a brand new lifestyle. She starts to enjoy the newness of living different lives, but eventually she wonders if it's possible to find happiness in one of the realities she's being afforded.

March 2024

The Great Divide by Cristina Henríquez

Debuting tomorrow, The Great Divide is a tale about the intersection of lives, compassion, and dedication. Set in Panama, the novel allows readers to form an intimate relationship with Omar, Ada Bunting, and John Oswald as they navigate circumstances that bring them together.

Despite his father's disdain for a new canal that's been commissioned to be built, Omar finds himself among one of the workers tasked with paving the way for it to exist. It's backbreaking work that takes a toll on him, but his weariness is comforted by Ada. Having seen firsthand how Ada cares for those who are fragile or sick, scientist John Oswald immediately enlists her help due to his wife being sick.

The Great Divide sweeps you into it's compassionate arms and has an ending that'll surely make your heart swell.

The House on Mango Street by Sandra Cisneros

To celebrate it's 40th anniversary, Jenna Bush Hager's book club has named The House on Mango Street as it's second pick for March! It's about Esperanza Cordero's desire to define who she is outside of what her Spanish culture has chosen for her. There's moments of sheer bliss that make heart-wrenching recollections easier to stomach, but Esperanza always finds a way to embrace how these things make her who she is.

February 2024

Good Material

Good Material is the new coming-of-age novel for adults who are still trying to figure out if they're adulting properly and revolves a series of events that makes main character Andy feel like he's down on his luck. From watching the breakdown of his longterm relationship to feeling like he's not growing as a comedian, it's clear that Andy is ready to do whatever it takes to become better in the love and career departments. But, is he truly ready to learn his life's lessons and will he be prepared for what happens next?

January 2024

The Waters

Despite Donkey's desire to run free in Whiteheart, her family's past threatens to disrupt that and then some. Will she be able to understand what's threatening the community around her or history repeat itself? Find out when the book releases January 9, 2024.

December 2023

We Must Not Think of Ourselves

#ReadWithJenna announced its December pick yesterday and it's a historical novel that's sure to tug at your heartstrings. We Must Not Think of Ourselves follows Adam Paskow's journey as a Jew held captive by the Nazis. He later finds himself working alongside others who are committed to immortalizing history as it unfolds around them. Not without flaws, Adam unintentionally falls in love with Sala Wiskoff despite the latter being a married mother. This thrusts him into a world filled with complicated choices fueled by the need to survive and love.

Will his choices hinder those he's agreed to help or will he prove that taking risks is necessary for history to move forward? Pick up a copy of We Must Not Think of Ourselves to find out!

November 2023

The Sun Sets in Singapore

To help ring in a new month, Jenna Bush Hager's book club announced its November pick earlier today. Available for purchase tomorrow, The Sun Sets in Singapore introduces us to three women whose paths seem different at first glance. However, each of them have something that's lurking behind initial assumptions. As Dara, Amaka and Lillian find themselves 'lost' in Singapore's paradise, they begin to realize there is a such thing as too much tranquility - especially if it's disguised to hide life-altering truths. Will they be able to confront what they've escaped from or will it continue to follow them like shadows on a summer day?

October 2023

How To Say Babylon

Jenna Bush Hager's October pick is a tale of what happens when toxic traditional views begin to threaten a family's foundation. Young Safiya Sinclair must come to grips with her father's authoritative reign over her family, especially when she realizes her mother's only act of rebellion is making sure her daughters are educated. It's something that Sinclair allows to open her mind and set her free from her father's views.

A Woman Is No Man

Let your curiosity and assumptions about this book's cover introduce you to the journey of Deya. While she has her sights set on going to college and chasing her dreams, her strict grandmother is only concerned about Deya becoming someone's wife. Tradition seems to rule her life, and it's the last thing Deya wants. A random turn of events grants her wish and takes her on a journey of self-discovery where she learns what it means to be a woman whose voice is not only heard, but also respected.

Searching For Sylvie Lee

Families can carry hidden secrets that threaten to undo everything one knows once they begin searching for the truth. And this is exactly what happens when Amy rushes to find out what happened to her older sister Sylvie after her disappearance. With her confidence growing as she draws nearer to the truth, Amy is faced with the difficult task of seeing her family without rose-colored glasses and has to decide what that means for them as well as her.

Nothing to See Here

When Lillian drifts apart from her roommate and eventual friend Madison, she thinks nothing of it. That is until Madison begs her to help her caring for her stepchildren whose irritation manifests as fire. Over time Lillian is able to develop a beautiful relationship with the twins and learns the depths of her love are limitless.

The Girl With The Louding Voice

As she grows up in Nigeria, Adunni longs for a future that looks different from what she's always known. She goes to great lengths to figure out how to do so and this takes her down a path filled with sorrow and faith.

Valentine

When Mary Rose Whitehead finds young Gloria Ramirez on her doorstep, she quickly realizes a vicious act of brutality happened. Unfortunately, justice isn't swift and this leads Whitehead to take matters into her own hand.

A Burning

A Burning takes readers on a tale that intertwines the lives of three different people. Beginning with the public smear campaign of Jivan, readers are then introduced to a gym teacher whose ambitions cloud his judgment and a sweet, yet misunderstood soul who works to clear Jivan's name.

Friends and Strangers

Friends and Strangers follows Elisabeth and Sam as they navigate what it means to show up in the different seasons of their lives. They somehow form an unlikely friendship that's quickly threatened and leads to things that are hard to come back from.

Leaving The World Behind

When Amanda and Clay decide to take a breather from city life with their teenagers, they initially feel they're in for peace and quiet at the rural location they've chosen. Unfortunately for them, the owners of the home they're renting arrive in the middle of the night. It's a tale of wariness that spills over and it's up to the reader to decide if it's warranted or not.

White Ivy

People aren't always what they seem, and Ivy Lin is a prime example of this. She learns how to steal from her grandmother, and she doesn't stop until her mother decides enough is enough. After being sent to China, Ivy grows to become trustworthy and evens bumps into her former crush's sister. But, her past begins to haunt her and she finds out that some things are hard to forget.

What's Mine And Yours

Gee and Noelle's worlds collide when integration brings them together. Behind the scenes we find that their mothers — both with strong opposing views — are doing what they feel is best to prepare their children for a life in America. Each has their own reasoning even if it threatens to erase who their children truly are.

Good Company

Flora Mancini is forced to question the life she and her husband have built when she discovers he didn't actually lose his wedding ring years ago. It's enough to make anyone go mad, but she somehow works to piece together the puzzle to discover the truth and decide how to move forward.

Malibu Rising

Things reach a fever pitch in this tale about family secrets and longing. Each of the Riva siblings have their own ghosts and anticipation to look forward to as their famous summer party draws near. It's only a matter of time before things bubbling underneath the surface burst in front of everyone.

Hell of a Book

Hell of a Book is about an author who's being followed by an imaginary child and a Black boy named Soot. As the past and present collide, Hell of a Book somehow lives up to its name in a reckoning tale.

Bright Burning Things

Bright Burning Things sheds light on a former entertainers love for her son and struggle to part ways with drinking. It's a tale that's familiar to those who have parents who struggle with alcoholism and the pain it often inflicts.

Black Cake

With their mother's cryptic message and a family-long recipe involving black cake looming between them, brothers Byron and Benny must work together to learn more about her history. They also have to find a way to repair their relationship before everything that still ties them together is lost forever. Be sure to read Black Cake before it comes out on Hulu this November!

Remarkably Bright Creatures

Tova Sullivan has suffered two great tragedies in life — the death of her husband and her son's unsolved disappearance. When she befriends an octopus named Marcellus, he becomes determine to help her understand what happened to her son before evidence is completely lost at sea.

Check Out More Titles From Jenna Bush Hager's Book Club:

• The Last Romantics by Tara Conklin
• The Unwinding of the Miracle by Julie-Yip Williams
• Evvie Drake Starts Over by Linda Holmes
• Patsyby Nicole Dennis-Benn
• The Dearly Beloved by Cara Wall
• The Dutch House by Ann Patchett
• Late Migrations by Margret Renkl
• Dear Edward by Ann Napolitano
• Writers & Loversby Lily King
• All Adults Hereby Emma Straub
• The Comebackby Ella Berman
• Here For Itby R. Eric Thomas
• Transcendent Kingdomby Yaa Gyasi
• The Bluest Eyeby Toni Morrison
• Black Buckby Mateo Askaripour
• The Four Windsby Kristin Hannah
• Send For Meby Lauren Fox
• Great Circleby Maggie Shipstead
• The Turnoutby Megan Abbott
• Beautiful Countryby Qian Julie Wang
• The Lincoln Highwayby Amor Towles
• The Familyby Naomi Krupitsky
• The School For Good Mothersby Jessamine Chan
• Groundskeepingby Lee Cole
• Memphisby Tara M. Stringfellow
• These Impossible Thingsby Salma El-Wardany
• The Measureby Nikki Erlick
• The Many Daughters of Afong Moyby Jamie Ford
• Solitoby Javier Zamora
• The Whalebone Theatreby Joanna Quinn
• The Cloistersby Katy Hays
• The Secret Historyby Donna Tartt
• Samby Allegra Goodman
• Maameby Jessica George
• Black Candle Womenby Diane Marie Brown
• Camp Zeroby Michelle Min Sterling
• Chain Gang All Starsby Nana Kwame Adjei-Brenyah
• The Celebrantsby Steven Rowley
• Banyan Moonby Thao Thai
• Summer Sistersby Judy Blume
• Amazing Grade Adamsby Fran Littlewood