How To Be More Confident At Work, Using Your Myers-Briggs Personality Type

Feb 19, 2024

Communicating at work can be hard! Sometimes, it might seem as if your boss is speaking a different language and seeing life from some weird and incomprehensible angle. And in a way, that could be true. It’s just that rather than coming from an extraterrestrial culture, they may just have different personality preferences, and even a different personality type altogether. But all is not lost for your job. Here are some tips for first recognizing some aspects of your boss’s personality and then using this knowledge to speak their language, based on the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) personality framework. As you better learn to navigate different personality and communication styles among your co-workers and higher-ups, you'll quickly learn how to be more confident at work — communicating your own needs, setting strong boundaries, and working more seamlessly toward the same unifying goals.

What is the MBTI?

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The MBTI looks at four aspects of our personality:

Extraversion-Introversion: Where people prefer to take and direct their energy.
Sensing-Intuition: How people take in information.
Thinking-Feeling: Which way decisions are made.
Judging-Perceiving: Whether people prefer to live in a more planned and structured way or a more spontaneous way.

In each pair we will prefer one approach more than the other. Use the descriptions below to understand what your preferences are, and those of your boss, so you can have a more harmonious work life.

How To Be More Confident At Work Whether You're An Extrovert Or Introvert

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Picture this: a coworker sends you a quick question over slack that you don't have the answer to. You know that your boss would have this info easily, but they're in a power hour. Should you drop by their desk, send them a slack message of your own, or hold off altogether? Knowing how your boss may respond in this situation can help you create a more lasting and meaningful work relationship over time, and it all could boils down to whether or not they have a personality preference for Extraversion or Introversion. But how do you know which you both have a preference for? And how can you communicate if they're different? Let's break it down.

You or boss may have a personality preference for Extraversion if:

Gets energized by interacting with people and the outside world in general and enjoys or seems to enjoy the buzz of a busy workplace.
Becomes bored and de-energized by spending quiet time on your own or their own.
Likes to talk things through, often without thinking them through first, and wants to take action quickly.

On the flip side, one of you may have a personality preference for Introversion if:

Become worn out by interacting with people and the outside world in general, wanting a break from people and a busy workplace to recharge your or their batteries.
Enjoys and gains energy from spending quiet time on your own or their own.
Prefers to think things through before saying anything or taking action.

If both you and your boss have the same preference, it’s likely that you’ll communicate well. But we've got some suggestions for you if they don't exactly match up, too!

If you have an Extraversion preference and your boss has an Introversion preference:

If you ask them a question wait for an answer. Maybe count to ten to yourself before you say anything. If they don’t answer straight away, it doesn’t mean that they are keeping something from you or didn’t understand your question. They might be thinking through exactly what to say.
Don’t interrupt or talk over them. If they pause for a moment, they haven’t necessarily finished speaking! Don’t feel that you have to fill every silence; let them think.
In meetings, and especially in online meetings, make space for them to say their piece.

If you have an Introversion preference and they have an Extraversion preference:

Be prepared for them to do a lot of the talking but be ready to jump in when you have a chance.
Work out strategies for contributing to meetings. This could include, for example, making sure that you are the first to contribute, or being prepared to say, "Let me get back to you on that."
Share your views verbally with them. Maybe write things down first if you want to be sure to get things right – but relying on email or other written communication may not have impact.

Sensing Vs. Intuition At Work

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Let's dig deeper into the scenario above. Assume you've decided the way you're going to ask your boss the question — next, you've got to decide how you want to frame the question. Does your boss love a lot of details, giving them the ins-and-outs of the context to the fullest extent? Or does your boss want you to cut to the chase a little more and give them everything on a brief, need-to-know basis? These could intimate that your boss has a personality preference for Sensing or Intuition.

You or your boss may have a personality preference for Sensing if:

Focus on the present and rely on and trust your own or their own experience and the evidence of the senses.
Want to know the facts, not the theory.
Take a realistic approach.

However, you or your boss may have a personality preference for Intuition if:

Anticipate the future and are more interested in how things connect and fit into the bigger picture.
Want to know and understand the theory, the ideas, the framework behind any facts.
Take an imaginative approach.

If you prefer Sensing and your boss has a preference for Intuition:

Cut out the details when you’re describing a project, plan or strategy. Intuitives can get bored by detail and will stop taking in information. They’ll take away a clearer picture of what you are trying to say if you keep things high level.
Don’t be offended or feel put down if they seem to change the subject mid-way through a conversation. The connection they’ve made might seem entirely reasonable and logical to them.
They might come up with suggestions that seem ridiculous at first but don’t dismiss this - there might be a good idea in there to build on!

If you prefer Intuition and your boss has a preference for Sensing:

The first time you meet, try not to show off how clever you can be. Yes, there’s a chance that your boss might be impressed, but they might think you’re not as impressive as you think you’re being.
You might suddenly think of a really novel idea for a project. Stop and think this through before sharing this with your boss. They will need to be convinced, with details and data, that this will actually work.
Stick to the facts when communicating. Talk about practical outcomes and the evidence of past experience, not how your ideas fit into a theoretical framework.

Thinking Vs. Feeling At Work

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While how and when you deliver a message, question, or otherwise to your boss is important, you also want to understand how they like to handle situations. Is your boss the kind of person who revels in questions at work, jumping into teamwork mode to problem-solve together? Or do they want you to propose a solution alongside your question to quicken the pace and better exhibit your on-the-job knowledge? Neither are necessarily the wrong, and it doesn't have to be one or the other, but those two types could indicate that your boss has a personality preference for Thinking or Feeling.

You or your boss may have a personality preference for Thinking if:

Think that it’s important to make a logically correct decision, where everyone is treated the same, even if this means some people may be upset or disadvantaged.
Focus on and talk more about the tasks that need to be done at work rather than the people.
Find that your or their first impulse is to criticize (even if it is constructive criticism) rather than to offer praise.

However, you or your boss may have a personality preference for Feeling if:

Feel that it’s most important to make a decision that works for everyone involved, and fits with what feels right or with your or their values, even if it’s not the objectively most logical decision.
Focus on and talk more about people and their relationships than on the jobs that need to be done.
Tend to offer praise and find it difficult to criticize – even constructively.

If you prefer Thinking and your boss has a preference for Feeling:

Don’t question their competence or wonder if they have an ulterior motive when they give you praise before a task is finished. They will genuinely appreciate the effort you are putting in, even if there are no results yet.
When they ask you how you are doing, how your family is, don’t worry; they are probably genuinely interested. And why not ask them too; they will likely appreciate it.
If you want to influence or persuade them, show them how your suggestion chimes with their values, is the best one for the people involved, and feels right.

If you have a preference for Feeling and your boss prefers Thinking:

Don’t worry if they don’t give you any feedback, praise or criticism while you are working on a task. A Thinking boss will typically wait until the task is finished.
Don’t be offended if they get straight down to business without breaking the ice first. They are likely quite task-focused. But if they want to open up, that’s fine!
If you want to influence or persuade them, show them why your suggestion is the logical, objectively correct one.

Judging Vs. Perceiving At Work

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Now that you've asked your boss the question, you'll want to consider how to follow up later. Does your boss want clear documentation for how you solved the problem, who the stakeholders were, what happened afterwards, and if there's any more work that needs to be done on the project? Or does your boss prefer that you take whatever information and solutions the two of you crafted and handle the situation on your own, only updating if you need anything else? These two options could mean that your boss has a personality preference for Judging or Perceiving.

You or your boss may have a personality preference for Judging if:

Likes things structured, scheduled and organized, making plans that may include timelines or target dates.
Gets a real buzz from getting tasks completed as soon as possible.
Likes to come to closure.

However, you or your boss may have a personality preference for Perceiving if:

Prefer to go with the flow and don’t like to be tied down to a schedule or structured plans.
Gets a buzz from doing things at the last minute and don’t get round to finishing them early.
Likes to keep options open as long as possible.

If you prefer Judging and your boss has a preference for Perceiving:

Be aware that they might come up with last-minute suggestions or changes of plan. Control for this by specifying when you need a decision if the job is going to get done. You’ll likely need evidence to back this up.
Don’t be tempted to dismiss those last-minute ideas though – keeping options open as long as possible can pay dividends.
Don’t be alarmed if your boss emails or DMs you out of work hours. It likely isn’t urgent.

If you have a preference for Perceiving and your boss has a preference for Judging:

If you want to change plans, make sure that you can give very solid reasons for doing so, especially if your boss would see this as last-minute.
Demonstrate to them that you can deliver results even if you don’t start a project straight away – they will be less likely to micromanage you.
Talk through how a more flexible working arrangement should mean that you can be more productive.

I hope this confidence-boosting framework helps set you up for success in your 9 to 5 — and at the team happy hour! 😌

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How To Train For A 5K, According To A (Very Fast) Professional Distance Runner

A 5K is a 3.12 mile race, and it's one of the most popular distances around the world for hobby joggers and elite athletes alike. Unlike a half marathon or full marathon, the 5K leaves you feeling tired, but able to actually walk afterwards — and with the same sense of accomplishment. Some seasoned runners may look down on the 5K, but I'm here to tell you that it's no small feat. In fact, in my 14 years of competitive running, the 5K was my main focus for 12 years.

If you're looking to run your first 5K and have no background in cardio or endurance sports, a simple google search for “beginner 5k workouts” will lead you to dozens of workout plans. While I have coached true beginners, my coaching specialty is with more intermedia runners, or runners trying to run their fastest 5K. You don't have to be a standout athlete or elite runner to set goals, and there are some simple steps everyone can take to get faster. Heres how to train for a 5K race, the Paxton way.

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The first step to bettering your 5K is to pick a race and sign up for it — most cities have a few 5K to choose from each weekend, so there should be plenty to choose from. Having a race on the calendar ensures you won’t skip out on your training. I recommend giving yourself 8-10 weeks to properly train.

The best 5K training plans, in my opinion, include 4-5 days of running a week. Every week should include:

One or two speed workouts
A few easy jogs
A long run

You should never run hard or fast two days in a row — easy jogging and rest between speed workouts are both essential for rebuilding muscles damaged with hard workouts. Here's how each of the three main training workouts should go.

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Speed Workouts

Every speed workout should begin with a 5-10 minute jogging warm up and a 5-10 minute jog/walk cooldown. This will help ensure you do not pull or strain any muscles.

The actual "speed" part of speed workouts can go one of two ways:

Run 2-3 minutes at a harder 7 out of 10 effort, with a standing or walking rest of 2-3 minutes between each push.
Run 6-8 repeats of a steep hill for 45-60 seconds in length with a walk back down, before repeating again.

Note: These are not sprint workouts, and you should never push yourself so hard that you're lying on the ground gasping for air afterwards.

Easy Jogs

Easy jogs should be kept at a conversational pace, so this would be a good time to grab your girlfriend or hop on the phone if you want some company. The best jogs should be about 2-3 miles in length, or 20-35 minutes in duration.

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio/PEXELS

Long Runs

Long runs are arguably the most important workout of the week, and anyone trying to better their 5K time should make sure to include them in their training plan. Like the name suggests, a long run should be your longest run of the week. Your longest run can be anywhere from three miles at the beginning of the plan to 12 miles if you're an experienced and seasoned vet. I recommend starting with 3 miles at the beginning of your 8-10 week plan and working your way up to 5-8 miles by the end. You should do this by adding one half to a full mile each week. Although it may sound silly to run 8 miles in order to run a 3.1 mile race, this will help build your endurance more than any of your other weekly runs. Having endurance will make the race seem easier, and I can guarantee you'll pass people left and right in your final mile.

Note: You should also have at least 10 days between your longest long run and your 5k race so that you can feel as fresh as possible on race day.

Photo by Blue Bird/PEXELS

The most important thing to remember on race day is to not go out too fast. If you sprint the first mile, the rest of the race will be miserable. Race day adrenaline will make you jittery and willing to sprint at the start, but working on controlling that will ensure a better race experience. Try to make your second and third mile faster than your first and give it all in the last .1 mile. After you’re done, soak in the race day atmosphere and grab a free banana! Don’t forget that the post race pain is temporary and remember not to sign up for another race while on an endorphin high!

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Another New Taylor Swift Song Is Coming This Summer

As if surprise dropping an extra 15 songs for The Tortured Poets Departmentwasn't enough, Taylor Swift fans are getting another new song this summer thanks to Gracie Abrams' new album The Secret of Us. The Eras Tour opener revealed the collaboration when she dropped her album track list May 13, and needless to say, the internet went crazy. The song will be released with the full album on June 21, 2024.

Image via Gracie Abrams/Instagram

"Us. Feat @taylorswift," Gracie Abrams said in an Instagram story. "All I can tell you for now is that some of the most fun I've ever had in my whole entire life was writing this song together. Hands down. I am currently smiling and sweating thinking about it and I'll never get over the shock of seeing this one on the tracklist. You know how I feel."

Taylor Swift has been teasing "Us" since the release of TTPD thanks to a notebook with "Us" written across it — both at the library installation and in the "Fortnight" music video.

Gracie Abrams has talked about how much she loves Taylor Swift throughout her entire career, and the two quickly became friends! Gracie showed up to Taylor's birthday, and even got to sing her hit song "I Miss You, I'm Sorry" with Taylor during the Eras Tour after her opening set got canceled during the July 1 show in Cincinnati, Ohio.

“My set was canceled for safety reasons,” Gracie says on The Tonight Show With Jimmy Fallon. “Then Taylor texted me being like, ‘Hey, come out with me and do ‘I Miss You, I’m Sorry?” We ran it one time in her room and then did it there. I blacked out.”

“It’s a real masterclass to watch her do what she does,” she continues. “I felt like I was at college for this job. I watched every single one of her shows that I was lucky enough to open. I watched from every place possible in each stadium, just trying to pick up on how she’s able to do what she does.”

Are you excited for the new Gracie Abrams x Taylor Swift collab? I love Gracie's new song "Risk" so I can't wait to hear "Us"!

Lead image via Gracie Abrams/Instagram

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8 Effective Ways To Reduce Stress Based On Your MBTI

Are you stressed right now? Maybe not so stressed that you curl up in a ball, or run around screaming, but most of us have at least some stress in our lives. And often that’s a good thing; the right amount of stress motivates us and gets us up in the morning. But if stress gets too much, we start to suffer, become demotivated, and eventually collapse as our nervous system falls apart.

Fortunately, there are ways in which we can build our resilience. Some of these are useful for everyone; getting support from your family and friends, nurturing a positive view of yourself, doing things that you enjoy and find relaxing, developing realistic goals and taking action to achieve them. But some will be unique to you, to your particular circumstances to your personality. If you know your personality type, you will have a head start on knowing what your stress triggers are (and so dealing with them), how you react to stress, and how to cope with that reaction. In other words, how to build resilience.

Personality Types And How They Deal With Stress

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The personality type framework, as measured by the Myers-Briggs(MBTI) assessment, looks at four aspects of personality:

Extraversion-Introversion — People with an Extraversion personality preference are energized by and focus their attention on what’s happening around them, their external world. They are likely to find spending too much time alone without enough external stimulation quite stressful. People with an Introversion preference are energized by and focus their attention on their inner world of thoughts and feelings. They can become stressed if they are forced to spend too much time with others, or when they have to cope with too many external distractions.
Sensing-Intuition — is all about how we take in information. People with a Sensing preference prefer information that is realistic, practical, built on past or present real-life experiences, and often detailed. They can be stressed when things are ambiguous and unclear, without any clear direction. People with an Intuition preference are interested in the big picture, in how things connect, and in ideas rather than facts. They will find having to follow exact instructions stressful, and working with people who demand lots of detail.
Thinking-Feeling —People with a Thinking preference want to make decisions using objective logic and will be stressed when decisions seem to be subjective, or when they are forced to concentrate on people rather than the task at hand. People with a Feeling preference want to make decisions that line up with their values and they will be stressed if they feel that those values are not being respected, and when there is conflict.
Judging-Perceiving — People with a Judging preference want to live in an organized, planned way and will find dealing with disorganized people stressful, or having to rush things at the last minute. People with a Judging preference want to live in a more spontaneous, emergent way and will become stressed when they have to deal with inflexible people, or when they are forced to make decisions before they feel they really need to.

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Everyone will have a preference for Extraversion (E) or Introversion (I), for Sensing (S) or for Intuition (N), for Thinking (T) or for Feeling (F), and for Judging (J) or for Perceiving (P). These four preferences combine together dynamically to give one of 16 types. For example, if someone has preferences for Extraversion, Sensing, Thinking and Judging, then their overall type would be ESTJ. If you know your type, you can identify your likely stressors (and so avoid or mitigate them), your typical behavior under everyday stress (so that you can recognize when you are stressed) and what to do to cope with that reaction, stop the stress cycle and so build resilience. Here’s the detail for each type.

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ESTP and ESFP

Stressors

Lack of stimulation and excitement
Theoretical, abstract tasks without any practical application right now
Being physically confined, e.g. though illness or circumstance

Behavior under everyday stress

Seeks out more and more external stimulation and excitement
May behave in a thrill-seeking or dangerous way or over-indulge
Lives solely in the present moment and will not make any decisions

How to stop the stress cycle

Pause, stop what you are doing, or think through what you will do next before you do it

Image via Photo by Karolina Grabowska/Pexels

ESTJ and ENTJ

Stressors

Inefficient people, systems, or organizations
Lack of closure, not being able to make decisions, blockers
Having to focus on people's feelings, rather than the task

Behavior under everyday stress

Becomes overly directive, forceful, or even aggressive
Makes snap decisions and imposes them on others
Dismisses evidence/other opinions that don't fir your view

How to stop the stress cycle

Stop making any decisions until you have taken some time out to explore all the available information.

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ENTP and ENFP

Stressors

People who say "it'll never work"
Too much seemingly irrelevant detail
Lack of variety; not being able to do anything new

Behavior under everyday stress

Shares increasingly impractical ideas with more and more people
Unable to take things seriously, becomes destructively 'playful'
Will be tied down to decisions

How to stop the stress cycle

Slow down. Take some time out to quietly decide on a course of action

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ESFJ and ENFJ

Stressors

Conflict with others and between others
Lack of warmth, not having friendliness reciprocated
Injustice in the world at large

Behavior under everyday stress

Become effusive and over-friendly
Becomes demanding in getting your own and others' needs met
Interprets situations in terms of your values, ignoring any other evidence

How to stop the stress cycle

Step back from the situation and the people involved and consider alternatives and the facts

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INTP and ISTP

Stressors

Having your carefully reasoned solutions dismissed or ignored
Illogical decisions that have not been thought through
Excessive displays of approval or emotion from others

Behavior under everyday stress

Withdraws to solve problems by yourself
Fixates on finding the one correct solution
Ignores other people; makes decisions without informing them

How to stop the stress cycle

Talk to others to explore information and ideas

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ISTJ and ISFJ

Stressors

Having to act without detailed, practical information or plans
Having the lessons of your experience dismissed by others
Changing things that already work

Behavior under everyday stress

Obsessively searches for that one important piece of information
Withdraws from the outer world
Cannot make a decision until all the information has been found

How to stop the stress cycle

Talk to others to help you prioritize and make a decision

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ISFP and INFP

Stressors

People who ignore, dismiss, or contravene your values
Working in a job that is at odds with those values
Inflexible and unthinking people or organizations

Behavior under everyday stress

Withdraws into an inner dialogue
Obsessively works through decisions that fir your values
Ignores facts that do not fit with the picture you have painted

How to stop the stress cycle

Talk to others to get their reassurance and help in considering the facts and alternatives

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INTJ and INFJ

Stressors

Not having time to think through possibilities before answering
Having your well-considered ideas dismissed or ignored
Disorganized, opinionated people

Behavior under everyday stress

Withdraws to build increasingly complex ideas in your head
These models may become divorced from reality
Unable to act under every possibility has been explored

How to stop the stress cycle

Talk to others to help decide which of your many ideas should be pursued

When you feel stressed, it can get in the way of dealing effectively with life’s demands, and it can affect everything you do. Understanding your MBTI personality type will help you to build resilience.

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Top 5 Expert-Approved Sunscreen Without White Cast For Summer (And Every Day)

POV: It's a hot, summer day and you're enjoying it laying out on the beach. So, just as you normally would, you reapply your sunscreen to make sure you're looking out for your skin in the midst of the high UV rays. But a couple minutes later, you catch a clips of your appearance in a mirror and realize your whole face looks like it's covered in white paint — that's called a white cast, and yes...it's extremely annoying.

Enter in our dilemma: why does sunscreen always leave a white cast? It seems like no matter how much we re-apply, it always leave a white-ish gray shadow on our skin. Instead of agonizing over this all summer, we've asked the skincare experts which sunscreen to grab and how to avoid this pesky problem! Keep reading for the scoop on the best sunscreens without white cast for your everyday use!

What is white cast?

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White cast is the annoying grayish, white color that some sunscreens leave behind after you've applied them. And sometimes no matter how much you rub them in or blend them, it simply will not go away. Tosin Eyikogbe, MSN and skin expert gave us the full explanation on this. She says, "The active ingredients in mineral sunscreen, zinc and titanium oxide, are large rough, white particles. Because of this, when applied to the skin, traditional mineral sunscreen tend to leave an unwanted, ashy, white or grayish appearance."

Dr. Praveen Guntipalli also weighed in on this topic by saying, "These ingredients are effective at blocking UV radiation but can leave a visible white residue on the skin, especially if the particles are not finely milled or if the formulation lacks certain tinting additives that help the product blend into various skin tones." So, essentially, these sunscreens are working, but they end up leaving particles behind on the skin, ultimately causing a white cast to appear.

How can I avoid white cast?

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There are a few ways to avoid this problem. You can try a different formula, stay away from certain ingredients, or just try to blend it in as much as possible. A different formula or type of sunscreen will definitely help with this, as mineral sunscreens are more likely to cause the white cast, whereas chemical sunscreens don't. Eyikogbe says, "Chemical sunscreens, which contain organic compounds that are absorbed by the skin then convert UV rays to heat that is released, are offered in a variety of formats and are often paired with moisturizers to increase a light weight feel."

We love the sound of that! She adds, "These formulas typically don’t leave a white cast, however chemical sunscreens aren’t ideal for all skin types, as they can clog pores and irritate the skin, and compounds including oxybezone and octinoxate are harmful to marine animals and can damage fragile coral reef ecosystems."

What ingredients should you look for in your sunscreen to avoid white cast?

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If you have sensitive skin like me, then you know you always have to double check labels and look into ingredients lists before buying products; especially when it comes to sun care. I'm very sensitive to certain ingredients and perfumes so I have to look carefully. We asked skincare experts what their thoughts were on what ingredients to keep an eye out for and this is what they had to say!

Eyikogbe says,"Mineral sunscreens, which typically contain inorganic compounds, titanium or zinc dioxide, can traditionally leave the notorious 'white cast' due to the reflection of the metal oxides on the skin. But there are newer formulas that have eradicated the old-school white cast and provide excellent mineral protection without a white cast."

Board certified dermatoligst Dr. Divya Sachdev says, "I highly recommend tinted zinc oxide-based pure mineral sunscreens with an SPF of 30 or higher. These sunscreens are not only effective at protecting against UV rays but also include antioxidants like vitamin C, green tea, and raspberry seed oil that help combat free radicals from oxidative damage caused by sunlight."

What are some helpful tips for sunscreen?

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If you're looking for something that will blend in seamlessly into your skin, and easily go into your daily routine then I'd really recommend tinted moisturizer with SPF or a CC cream. One of my favorites is the Tatcha SPF which really blends into the skin for a nice glow. I'd recommend using this daily!

Dr. Sachdev says, "Remember, it’s crucial to reapply sunscreen every 2-3 hours when spending time in the sun, wear sun-protective clothing such as wide-brim hats and sunglasses, and maintain a diet rich in antioxidants to enhance your skin's defense against sun damage." Duly noted, doctor!

Best Sunscreens Without White Cast To Shop Right Now

Photo via Sephora

Supergoop Unseen Sunscreen

The Supergoop Unseen Sunscreen gives your skin the nicest glow, and it's the perfect base for your makeup. It's definitely a crowd favorite for good reason!

Blendability: 5/5 Doesn't pill and blends so nicely!

Underneath Makeup: 5/5 It's glowy perfection!

Protection: 4/5 It's lower in SPF, but still does the job!

EltaMD UV Elements

Dr. Divya Sachdev, "Favorites of mine include EltaMD UV Elements and Suntegrity 5-in-1 Natural Moisturizing Face Sunscreen, which avoid any white cast. These tinted formulations also contain iron oxides that provide additional protection against UV damage and blue light exposure." I'm a big fan of the EltaMd sunscreen, and feel like it always makes my skin feel light and not too heavy with products!

Blendability: 5/5 I love how creamy it is!

Underneath Makeup: 5/5 Feels like a moisturizer!

Protection: 4/5 A higher SPF is always better, but this is still great!

Photo via Sephora

Summer Fridays SPF Milk Sunscreen

Another sunscreen that I looove is the Summer Fridays SPF Milk Sunscreen. Every time I let one of my friends use it, I never get it back because it is that good. Genuinely is so milky and smooth, and it looks amazing underneath makeup or other skincare products!

Blendability: 5/5 Blends beautifully!

Underneath Makeup: 5/5 Doesn't feel and works as a primer!

Protection: 3/5 It isn't as high in SPF as I would like, but it works nonetheless!

Innisfree Daily SPF Broad Specturm SPF 36

My personal favorite is the Innisfree Daily SPF, which blends in like moisturizer! It's genuinely so thin and creamy!

Blendability: 5/5 Blends into your skin within seconds.

Underneath Makeup: 5/5 Genuinely could be a primer for how well it sits.

Protection: 3/5 Wish it was higher SPF, but it's so thin, so it makes sense!

ColorScience Sunforgetabble Face Shield

We asked Tosin Eyikogbe, and she says, "My personal favorite at the moment is ColorScience Sunforgettable Face Shield Flex SPF 50, which contains all mineral active ingredients and comes in four shades that cover a wide range of skin tones. It has a light weight feel and provides a luminous and even skin tone. A lot of patients have told me it has replaced their need for foundation!"

Blendability: 5/5 Melts into the skin!

Underneath Makeup: 5/5 Blends in with your foundation and base great!

Protection: 5/5 It's high in SPF so definitely a winner!

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A Psychologist Shares 5 Ways You Can Combat The Loneliness Epidemic

Last month I chatted Amanda Montell by mentioning the glaring loneliness epidemic that's taken over lately. While we had a great conversation about overcoming our overthinking, it really got me wondering: how did we get here?

According to a study conducted by the U.S. Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murthy, the pandemic and our increased reliance on technology seems to be the source of the collective social decline we’re experiencing. In 2022 — two years out from the 2020 lockdowns — only 39% of adults reported feeling emotionally close to others. For those of us who consider ourselves to be introverts, this may feel par for the social course — but it really isn't.

There's potential for greater health concerns here, both mentally and physically. Dr. Murthy discovered that a prolonged decline in social connection with others “...can increase your risk of heart disease by 29% and risk of stroke by 32%.” That’s no laughing matter, especially if heart disease runs in your family like it does in mine.

It’s something Eric Liu, CEO of Citizen University elaborated on during an episode of NPR’sMorning Edition podcast last year. He said, “When you are alone and disconnected, there’s more stress, there’s more inflammation, there’s more anxiety.” And while some of us prefer our own company, statistics show that's not always the healthiest choice for us in the long run.

To understand all this even more, I spoke with Licensed Perinatal Mental Health & Trauma Therapist Becca Reed, LCSW, PMH-C. Together, we broke down how we can combat the loneliness epidemic and positively affect our health at the same time. Here's what I learned!

How prevalent is the loneliness epidemic actually?

Image via Liza Summer/Pexels

I've joked with my sister that there seems to be a change in the way people interact with each other since the pandemic, but there's some truth to it. Reed says, "Since the pandemic began, I've observed a marked increase in feelings of loneliness across various age groups. What’s particularly interesting is the depth of loneliness people have expressed, even after moving back into engaging in normal activities."

Think about the last time you went to the grocery store — did it seem like some people exist in their own worlds without apparent regard for others? It could very well be a symptom of this very epidemic. "Many of my clients have reported feeling disconnected not just from others, but also from parts of themselves. The pandemic disrupted our regular social habits and created a void that many are still learning how to fill," explains Reed.

Does social media play a role in the way we perceive introversion and loneliness?

Image via Arina Krasnikova/Pexels

I can't completely shun social media because it's introduced me to different brands, people, and even my career as a journalist. However, I've also wondered if social media has a major influence on the way we think and interact with the world around us — especially in regards to introversion and loneliness. Reed believes there's more to it than that.

"Our lifestyles and societal values greatly influence how we view introversion and loneliness. For instance, highly individualistic cultures, like in the U.S., often celebrate extroversion," she says before adding, "This celebration can make quieter, introverted ways of engaging with the world seem less valuable."

This may pose an issue for those who are always busy and aren't actively interacting with others beyond a surface level. Reed says, "Additionally, our busy modern lifestyles are filled with long work hours and personal commitments. This can leave little room for deep, sustained social interactions. As a result, those who may not reach out actively can feel further isolated."

What are some signs that someone is experiencing loneliness?

Image via Ivan Samkov/Pexels

Dr. Murthy also told NPR, “Some people react to loneliness by withdrawing and getting quiet. Others react to loneliness by becoming irritable and angry, and they may lash out more” before adding “...sometimes we need somebody else to tell us, ‘Hey, you’ve been withdrawing more’ to help us understand we might actually be dealing with loneliness.”

This is something that Reed also reiterated. She says, "Signs of loneliness frequently include significant changes in mood and behavior. This might look like increased irritability, persistent sadness, or withdrawal from usual activities" while "Physically, loneliness might manifest through disrupted sleep patterns or a change in appetite."

From personal experience, I've been known to dissociate if I'm feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or upset so I'm very familiar with exacerbating any loneliness I've felt by withdrawing. This also resulted in spending a lot of days in my early 20s sleeping when I wasn't working or remaining in my room with the door locked.

"If you notice a loved one seeming unusually quiet, canceling plans more frequently, or expressing feelings of emptiness, they might be experiencing loneliness," warns Reed.

How can we combat the loneliness epidemic in our daily interactions?

Image via Pavel Danilyuk/Pexels

If you've noticed that you're being affected by the loneliness epidemic, there are different ways to combat it. Reed says, "Small daily interactions can be very impactful to combating loneliness. Simply making eye contact, sharing a smile with a stranger, or having a quick chat with a neighbor can foster a sense of connection." This sounds so Starbucks and Bookstore-coded for those of us who don't want to feel overwhelmed by anything grand.

At the same time, Reed says there are things we can do in our personal relationships to help us start feeling a sense of community again. "Reaching out regularly to friends and family through calls, messages, and face-to-face interactions is essential. Building a community around shared interests, can also help bridge the isolation gap," she shares.

Is the loneliness epidemic going to be a prolonged problem, or is it possible to turn around?

Image via Alena Darmel/Pexels

Like other things, it can seem like the loneliness epidemic won't get any better. But, Reed wants you to have hope. "While it's possible the impact of the pandemic on social interactions could be a prolonged issue, humans are inherently driven to connect." Though she says, "The pandemic has intensified social anxieties and shifted communication habits."

This can look like people finding it difficult to interact with others the way they used to (hi social anxiety). Still, that doesn't mean we have to approach things as if there's nothing to look forward to in terms of interacting with others. Reed says, "People are finding new ways to engage with each other as we be come more aware of the impacts of loneliness and actively work towards building stronger, more resilient community networks. This adaptability is a positive sign that we're moving towards more interaction again, despite the challenges."

All we can do is turn lemons into lemonade as we continue to find new normals that support our lifestyles, communication, and connection needs.

Has the loneliness epidemic impacted you? Let us know in the comments and follow the conversation on Facebook.

Lead image via Tiana/Pexels

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