What The "Bama Rush" Doc Gets Right From Someone Who Lived It

bama rush documentary review

As I’m sure you’re well aware, Max (the baby of HBO Max and Discovery+) just released their highly-anticipated documentary, Bama Rush. Covering the social media phenomenon that is The University of Alabama’s Panhellenic rush, the doc promises a real look into the pledging process at (arguably) the most cutthroat Panhellenic program in the world. I’d like to think I have some insight into this process as a former Alabama sorority girl myself, and let me tell you all of the things the doc got right about this decades-old tradition that has rendered the nation speechless and TikTok obsessed.


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Bama Rush | Official Trailer | Max

For some context – The University of Alabama (UA) is one of 14 SEC (Southeastern Conference) universities, all of which participate in the Southern tradition of Panhellenic rush. With nearly 20 Panhellenic houses, over 2,000 active members and a slew of multimillion dollar chapter mansions lining the streets of Tuscaloosa, Alabama, it’s no wonder the process is such a spectacle to those outside of the insular community.

Of course, I must note that my 2019 rush experience was certainly different from the 2021 recruitment featured in Bama Rush. After all, TikTok was in its infancy, the college admissions scandal was still fresh, and there were absolutely no Kylie Jenner x Timothée Chalamet relationship rumors. However, if there’s anything UA does well it’s tradition, so most of my experiences are probably quite similar to those PNMs will encounter this Fall.

Can you sum up sorority culture at UA?

Courtesy of Alabama Panhellenic Association.

Well, I can certainly try! Like clockwork, every year hundreds of young women flock to UA’s pristine campus (Mind you, this all happens before classes even begin.) under the scorching August sun to test their luck at landing one of the coveted spots in a “top” house – or just any house for that matter. At UA, reputation is everything, so the house you get into matters.

Socially, the houses are divided into a few categories. You have the tier ranking system (top, middle and bottom) alongside the “Old Row” houses, AKA chapters that are deeply rooted in Alabama and/or the South. These Old Row houses typically have a strong Christian demographic, and recruit *almost* exclusively southern PNMs (potential new members). There are strong legacy ties within these houses, and these are the chapters that have a majority impact on the political interface of UA Greek life.

However, at least when I went to UA, Old Row houses are not equivalent to top houses. In fact, the top three houses aren’t a part of that community at all. This holy grail trifecta has a very niche recruiting strategy – they’re looking for the smartest, most attractive women that will contribute academically and socially to their on campus status. These chapters are notoriously hard to get into, as they almost always pre-determine their MC (member class) before the PNMs arrive on campus. (If you rushed at UA – you’ll definitely remember the deluge of active sorority members reaching out via social media before the no-contact period.)

Courtesy of Olivia Taylor

Once PNMs arrive on campus, they begin a week-long journey to finding their “home,” voting through various rounds (Open House, Philanthropy, Sisterhood, Preference Day) via a mutual ranking system. Essentially, as long as you and a house choose each other, you’ll continue onto the next round. Each round is structured around a common theme for the day, with the length of the sessions increasing as you progress. (By the end of this process you’ll be able to talk to a brick wall, believe me.) Eventually, PNMs that make it through each round will arrive at Bid Day, thus securing their spots in whatever house of their (kind of) choosing.

There are a plethora of rules PNMs and active members must abide by during this process, from a no-contact order to restrictions on what you can chat about (I was taught the Three Bs: No Boys, Bible or Booze). Oh, and you can’t, under any circumstances, bring any technology into the chapter houses. The moment the door songs begin, if you’re caught with any sort of technology (that’s not necessary to sustaining your health) you are automatically out of the process. No ifs, ands or buts.

And yes, all of these events are highly orchestrated, with each detail meticulously curated (from which active member talks to you to where you stand) over the course of months by a select recruitment committee. Every encounter you have has an underlying meaning, so you truly can’t take anything at face value. (i.e. If you’re seated close to the door, that means you’re last to arrive and first to leave, so that sorority may not be as inclined to add you to their MC.)

Securing a spot in any sorority isn’t guaranteed, let alone one in an Old Row or top house, so I can certainly sympathize with the stressors many of the women featured in the doc shared.

Courtesy of Alabama Panhellenic Association.

Oh, and this process isn’t free. Not only do you have to go through the lengthy process of submitting your application, resumé, and a several hundred dollar application fee, but you’re expected to dress to the nines every day of rush, no matter the weather or 5 a.m. wakeup call. This is nothing compared to the several thousand dollars you’ll be shelling out to maintain your membership per year, but nevertheless.

I should also mention the longstanding (and very patriarchal) tradition was only desegregated in 2013, literally a decade ago. While many UA chapters claim to be inclusive, out of hundreds of active members there are only a handful of diverse women in each house. The Alabama Panhellenic Association has a long way to go in ensuring a safe environment for minorities within their chapters, and I look forward to seeing how the community becomes more inclusive in the future.

Additionally, attractiveness plays a far-too-large role in the rushing process. Even though many houses claim that they do not base their decisions off of “looks,” it’s clear that isn’t true. Many women feel pressured to fit into the “Southern” model of beauty – thin, blonde hair, blue eyes and tan – and will go to extreme lengths to make the cut. I can certainly sympathize with these women, having felt the weight of these standards myself.

Who does "Bama Rush" follow?

Courtesy of Max

The documentary follows four young women as they get accepted to UA and embark on the rush process. The PNMs featured are Alabama natives Hailey Holliday and Makalya Miller, and out-of-state students Shelby Rose and Isabelle Eacrett.

Where are the "Bama Rush" girls now?

Rose went Phi Mu, and is currently majoring in public relations with a minor in digital content engagement.

“I love the University of Alabama. It has given me so much,” she said in a social media post on TikTok. “If I didn’t rush at the University of Alabama, I wouldn’t have stayed through the first semester, because the girls I met have given so much to me…I have nothing but positive things to say about campus and the sororities.”

Eacrett receives a bid from Alpha Delta Pi. She has the iconic tagline, “I’m nervited -- which is like, nervous and excited,” in the doc.

Both Miller and Holliday left the rush process early.

Were any of the women in "Bama Rush" penalized by their sororities?

It’s still unclear whether any participants were punished for working with HBO, however UA condemned rumors about secret filming during rush week. These rumors were, of course, later confirmed when the documentary project was announced.

“The University is aware of reports that outside parties have facilitated unauthorized recordings of our students involved in Panhellenic recruitment,” Shane Dorrill, a university spokesman, wrote in an email to AL.com. “The University unequivocally does not condone surreptitious filming or recording of students, some of whom are minors, without their consent. The University has not authorized any third-party entity to film, record, or document any recruitment activities and does not allow media inside occupied buildings such as residence halls and sorority houses.”

“Further, it has been repeatedly communicated that Alabama Panhellenic Association recruitment rules prohibit potential new members from filming or recording inside any chapter houses,” he added. “To be clear, the University is not involved with this production and finds these reported activities to be deplorable, especially when targeting recent high school graduates.”

The Alabama Panhellenic Association is aware of the documentary, but has declined commenting to various news sites on participants’ comments or questions about filming.

What does Bama Rush get right?

Courtesy of Olivia Taylor

1. Alabama is the Greek life standard.

“I remember when we were going through recruitment at Georgia, we would all be looking at what Alabama was doing,” says Rush Consultant Sloan Anderson. “Yeah, they’re just the trend-setters. I think that’s why so many out of state decide to go to the University of Alabama and rush. It’s just this beast, because Greek life is everything at Alabama.”

2. Rushing can be very, very stressful.

I truly cannot emphasize enough the pressure many women face throughout the rush process. Many Southern PNMs have spent their entire lives hearing their moms and grandmothers recount their sorority experiences alongside sorority-sisters-turned-lifelong-friends, so the pressure to join the right house is monumental. So Miller and Eacrett seeing Rush Consultants is shockingly standard for many of these women, and IMO demonstrates the utter importance of this tradition.

3. It’s a social hierarchy.

“Rush is a social stratification ritual, bar-none,” says Southern Beauty: Race, Ritual, and Memory in the Modern South author Elizabeth Boyd, who also visited UA to observe sorority rush parties. “Stratification in the sense of organizing people and groups of people into tiers of power, of status, or prestige. It’s a proving ground of competitive femininity, and the contemporary performance of the Southern belle.”

4. Sororities are ranked. And yes – rank matters.

“I think the competition mostly comes from the rankings of sororities – trying to get into one of those top or middle-tier houses and not getting into a bottom house,” says Pi Beta Phi active member Gracie O’Connor. “I think a lot of the times people like to rank – and by people, I usually mean fraternity boys or boys in general. I feel like they’re like, ‘Oh, this house has the hottest girls, so they’re a top house. These freshman are the hottest freshmen, so they’re going to be considered a top house.’”

Anderson agrees with O’Connor on fraternity influence, saying, “they have a social calendar, and they get to mix with certain sororities, but it’s only a limited amount. And the fraternities want to be mixing with the hottest sororities, of course, because they’re 20-year-old males. So that’s kind of where the ranking system comes from. They want to make sure the girls who are wearing their letters are up to their standards.”

Current Sigma Kappa member Rian Preston chimed in, sharing her experience with this hierarchical system. “The hierarchy of sororities that exist here really determines how your experience in the Greek system is going to be. There are a lot of things that you’re entitled to when you’re in a top-tier sorority. You’re entitled to test banks that are going to help you on your exams. You’re entitled to people in your sorority that have better connections, whether their parents are richer or more connected. You’re entitled to a male gaze that might be a little more beneficial to you. So being in a ‘bottom-tier’ sorority, I have to understand that at some point, there’s nothing I can do to change institutionalized rankings.”

Courtesy of Olivia Taylor

5. There are tons of odd rules.

I touched on this above, but I’m glad it was brought up in the doc. Generally, you can’t drink in your letters, bring alcohol into your sorority house, etc.

Some stricter rules were shared as well, though I never dealt with those myself. For instance, Hailey shares a “no wet hair” on the first floor of the house rule, and active Gamma Phi Beta member Leah Nelson says a friend told her about one house’s rule that said women could not leave their dorm “unless they had two out of three done, which was either you had to have your hair done, makeup done or outfit on. All it takes is one person to know what chapter you’re in and to reach out to somebody and you can be in trouble the next day.”

6. The Five Bs

I was taught three, but now the Five Bs are: Boys, Bible, Booze, Bucks and Biden (AKA politics). It’s a huge no-no to initiate any conversation relating to these, but if active members bring it up then it’s okay to engage.

7. Attractiveness plays a role, and many women suffer because of it.

It’s not everything, but it is important. Especially if you don’t have strong grades or many sorority connections, you can make up for any shortcomings if you’re conventionally attractive.

“I just have this image in my head that I need to be, like, tiny,” Miller tells her friends. “I look at myself, I see myself as fat. I know you guys say I’m not, but I see myself as that, and I can’t help it.”

8. Racism is far too normal on UA’s campus.

While UA does have historically Black NPHC (National Pan-Hellenic Council) chapters, the Panhellenic and IFC (Interfraternity Council) associations are incredibly white. As I mentioned before, UA Greek life was only desegregated a decade ago (two decades after the first Black women received a bid from a Panhellenic sorority), so you can imagine how much racism still goes on within the Greek life system and on campus.

“Everyone here thinks I’m everything but Black,” says Miller, who is mixed race. “Like I’m white and Black. They think I’m everything.” She said one guy “swore that I was just white and just really, really tan. If I’m too white, I’m whitewashed, but if I act too Black, then I’m not white enough. Like, what am I supposed to be because I’m both races? Why can’t I just act myself? I’m not acting a race -- you can’t act a race. I’m just split in two.”

Rian says that while she hasn’t experienced any “overt racism” at UA, she has been subjected to micro-aggressions. “I have come to know and love the people in my sorority and to know that they wouldn’t have loved or trusted me 40-50 years ago, it makes me feel upset,” Preston says. “And I honestly for my own self-preservation don’t really like to think about it.”

9. “The Machine” is real.

Otherwise known as Theta Nu Epsilon, the Machine is a highly secretive group of IFC fraternities and APA sororities designed to influence campus politics at the University of Alabama.

“They control everything on this campus. So if there’s an election, the Machine is rigging it. If there’s a homecoming queen, it’s the Machine candidate,” Garrett, an Alabama SGA associate justice, shares.

Alex Smith, a Phi Mu alum and former Machine student senator, gives a rare inside look at Machine operations. “At the end of the day, something just felt really dark and ugly about it,” she said. In 2015, Smith wrote a guest column for UA’s student-run newspaper The Crimson White titled “Why I’m leaving the Machine,” exposing her involvement and some of the organization’s activities. In the doc, PNMs and sorority members refused to even acknowledge its existence.

9. Rushing costs money, honey.

A year as a new member can run you nearly $10k, which includes chapter dues, a meal plan and house fees. If you live in the house, it can get even more expensive.

10. Beware of Standards.

The infamous standards board (which has since become synonymous with the patronizing “hey girly” text) have plagued everyone’s general understanding of the dos and don'ts of sorority life. But these judicial groups are very real – and very much a game of favoritism – and one too many violations will get you kicked out of your sorority for good.

11. You definitely don’t want to get blacklisted.

Both frats and srats have blacklists – and the tiniest misstep can secure your spot on one. Hailey dealt with this firsthand. She originally rushed in August of 2021 and chose a sorority house, but after wearing a different sorority sticker she was dropped. As she prepares to rush again, she overhears sorority girls talking about her blacklisted status. She ultimately decides not to rush. After all – sororities are all about branding, so how you present yourself is imperative.

What did the doc miss?

Courtesy of Alabama Panhellenic Association.

1. “Rank” is determined by more than just frat boys.

It’s a culmination of yes, fraternity influence, but also Southern ties, on campus reputation, high GPAs, and so much more.

2. You’re lucky to get a “chosen family.”

Sororities are branded as this welcoming sisterhood – a place where you’ll meet your future bridesmaids and besties for life. Unfortunately, this isn’t all that true for many members.You may meet a couple of friends, but ultimately most members end up “dropping” their sorority come junior year.

3. Fraternities are a huge issue.

Fraternities have an unnecessarily large role in sorority life, and TBH they need to be taken down a few notches. While reputation is everything for sororities – to the point where members can get kicked out for posting a “scandalous” picture, their male counterparts get away with anything and everything.

Certain frats were known for drugging women as part of an initiation ritual, or for sexually assaulting women regularly. Seriously. One house is actually known for sexually assaulting women, and it’s advised not to go there. Despite this – these men play a massive role in which sororities rank well and “deserve” parties with them, and which do not.

4. Hazing happens but it’s much more common in frats.

I never experienced hazing, nor did anyone I know. In conversations with frat members, though, their hazing rituals were next-level and should be scrutinized more thoroughly.

5. Sororities can be an incredible place of community.

There are plenty of issues within UA Panhellenic, but ultimately these organizations can lead to lifelong friendships, incredible memories and massive charitable contributions. Greek life is Alabama, and Alabama is Greek life. From football games to date parties, sisterhood events and more, sorority life is amazing for so many women. Experiencing this firsthand is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, and one that I will certainly never forget.

Where can I watch Bama Rush?

Bama Rush is streaming now exclusively on Max.

I must admit – writing this has been quite therapeutic for my ex-Panhellenic member’s soul. From a first-hand perspective, I truly enjoyed watching Bama Rush and seeing the many truths about the process brought out of secrecy, and highly recommend it to anyone with the slightest glimmer of curiosity.

Stay updated on all the latest pop culture news with Brit + Co.

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Calling all Star Wars nerds: After decorating the house with geeky accessories and DIYing our favorite character costume, wehad to address our favorite part of the saga: Princess Leia's hair. It's epic — period. In honor of Star Wars Day (May the Fourth be with you!) and the fact that Carrie Fisher finally got a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, here are some of my favorite Princess Leia hair moments — with a modern twist. I updated these three styles into fun, five-minute looks that any level of fan or fashion girl would want to work. They're perfect for dinner plans and Star Wars parties alike.

Princess Leia's Double Braids from "​Episode VI: The Return of the Jedi​" –> Casual Rope Braids

Images via Lucasfilm Ltd/20th Century Fox/Walt Disney Studio Motion Pictures/Brit + Co

Tight, leather-threaded braids get a casual update with these pigtails, perfect for those days you want an easy, lazy girl style.

Step 1: Section + Twist

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Take a tiny strand of hair near your temple and separate it into two equal sections. Taking one strand in each hand, twisting each section around your fingers in a counterclockwise direction. Then cross the pieces over one another in a clockwise motion and keep on going.

Step 2: Secure + Repeat

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When you reach the end of the strand, secure the rope braid with a clear elastic.

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Then repeat on the other side.

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You can also curl the ends of your hair if you want to dress this look up a bit!

Princess Leia's Milkmaid Braid from ​"Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back​" –> Messy Fishtail Crown Braid

Images via Lucasfilm Ltd/20th Century Fox/Walt Disney Studio Motion Pictures/Brit + Co

Image via Brit + Co

We’re putting a more romantic twist on Princess Leia’s chunky milkmaid braid with a messy fishtail-Dutch plaitand loose, long tendrils to frame your face.

Step 1: Section

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Start by sectioning your hair in half. Pin the right section in place so that it will be easier to work with the left one.

Step 2: Fishtail Dutch Braid

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Now take a small strand from the top of your head and start fishtail braiding with two alterations: Braid underneath instead of over the top (this gives the braid a cool 3D effect) and incorporate tiny strands as you go.

Step 3: Secure + Repeat

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Once you’ve incorporated all the hair, keep on braiding normally, then tie with an elastic. Then, braid the other section with one twist: Braid this section upwards.

Step 4: Pancake

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Gently separate your plaits — what’s called pancaking — to give your braids a fuller, messier look.

Step 5: Pin + Final Touches

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Lastly, use a couple of bobby pins to secure the braids in place and get the perfect crown result. And don't worry if some tiny pieces are sticking out: It's all part of the look!

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Date-night ready like that.

Princess Leia Space Buns from "Episode IV: A New Hope" –> Half-Up Half-Down Double Buns

Images via Lucasfilm Ltd/20th Century Fox/Walt Disney Studio Motion Pictures/Brit + Co

While this is hands down Princess Leia's most iconic hair look, it's one of the hardest to wear outside of Halloween. This half-up, half-down update featuring a pair of mini buns makes it feel both more attainable and of the moment.

Step 1: Section

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Use a fine-tooth comb to make a section from the ear to the top of your head.

Step 2: Cheerleader Pigtails

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Then make a high ponytail and secure it with an elastic. Once you’re done, repeat on the other side.

Step 3: Create the Buns

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Finger comb your hair to add a bit of volume, then start twisting your ponytail to create a bun. Bobby pin it in place, then repeat on the left side.

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Polish your next athleisure outfit with this so-cute style.

Which Star Wars are you going to watch tonight? Tag us in your Princess Leia hairstyles on Instagram!

This post has been updated.

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I'll admit out of the many teen dramas I've consumed, Outer Banks is one of the most ridiculous. But the insanity surrounding the plot is half the reason it's enjoyable! John B. wrestling an alligator with his bare hands? Kiara getting kidnapped then making a daring escape in her PJ's? John B. and Sarah getting married (kind of) by the power of "the sky, the stars, and the sea" after escaping the SBI?

Considering my favorite fan theory for the future is that Madelyn Cline's Sarah and Rudy Pankow's JJ learn they're secret siblings, I know the crazy train isn't slowing down anytime soon. I took to Reddit to find the wildest Outer Bankshot takes and I was not disappointed. Keep reading to see if you agree with any!

JJ and Kiara Never Should Have Happened

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While JJ and Kiara is one of the most popular ships on the show, a lot of Outer Banks fans think the "no Pogue-on-Pogue macking" rule from the pilot should have stayed in effect. The individual romances between Kiara and JJ, John B., and Pope make the story really messy, and the fact the show writes Kiara to be with all three of them in the span of three years gives a lot of viewers the ick.

I'll be team #Jiara forever (and literally screamed when The Backseat Lovers' "Kilby Girl" started playing during the motorcycle ride in season 3), but I'll say it would incredibly compelling to see a friend group take care of each other as much as the Pogues do without ever crossing over into romantic territory. That's found family, after all!

Pope Should Have Ditched The Treasure Hunt

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One Reddit user is convinced that "Pope should’ve focused on his future in school instead of giving everything up to search for treasure." And TBH, I totally agree.

In season 1, Pope has a breakthrough about the hidden treasure in the middle of his scholarship interview. He ditches the scholarship committee to tell the rest of the Pogues, throwing away a crazy educational opportunity. Pope beats himself up for it, and his parents definitely aren't pleased, but at least it meant he got to stay in the show instead of leaving for college, which leads me to...

Outer Banks Should Have Started With The Pogues In Their 20s

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As one of the only people alive who loves the post-time jump One Tree Hill, I would have loved to see OBX start off with the characters in their 20s (although it looks like that's where Outer Banks season 4 will pick up!). This would eliminate SO MANY problems from the jump because the Pogues wouldn't have to worry about missing school, they'd be more self-sufficient, and instead of being the same old high school drama, it could have provided a commentary on figuring out life in your 20s the same way Friends did.

Rafe Shouldn't Have Any Kind Of Redemption Arc In Outer Banks Season 4

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Drew Starkey the man that you are. According to one Reddit user, "Rafe should not have a love interest or a redemption arc" like we see in season 3. We spent all of season 1 and season 2 establishing that Rafe (played by Drew) would do anything it took to get what he wanted (including one successful murder and two other attempts?!). He shows next to no remorse for his actions, and exploring his literal psychopathic tendencies would take the show to a whole new level.

Big John Should Never Have Returned

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John B.'s dad's disappearance is the catalyst for the Pogues' journey at the beginning of Outer Banks, and Big John's return means the story feels somewhat repetitive in the third season, and it undoes a lot of the growth we've seen from John B. Plus, Big John is just SO chaotic, selfish, and dramatic. If he had truly died in season 1, we could have seen John B. wrestle with that finality, and how to cope with loss in the face of finding the treasure and falling in love with Sarah.

And Finally, Outer Banks Should Have Ended After Season 1

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Outer Banks season 1 was exactly what we needed at the height of the pandemic. It was escapist — both in terms of the beach vacation vibes, but also because the '00s aesthetic took us right back to simpler times — and it had such a wonderfully resolved finale that some fans think nothing has matched it.

Do you agree with any of these Outer Banks opinions? I'm such a romance fan, I don't know what I'd do if the show didn't have JJ and Kiara get together! Check out all the best New TV Shows coming this year for more.

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Mariska Hargitay is the woman of the hour anywhere she goes, with her iconic Law & Order: SVUrole as Olivia Benson under her belt for the last 25 years. The character is an absolute advocate to women — and assault victims of any gender — through her words, actions, and powerful convictions of each perpetrator on the show. She takes great care with her victims and pursues perpetrators with fervor, and slowly as you watch the show..the line blurs between Olivia and Mariska.

This isn't anything new — just recently Mariska literally stopped production on the show to help a child (who mistook her for an actual police officer) find her mom. It's just who Mariska is. She walks the walk and talks the talk — including during her speech at Variety's Power of Women's Power of Women event.

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As a Power of Women honoree, Mariska was recognized in regards to her work as an advocate for sexual assault survivors. She took the stage and used her platform to discuss rape and assault conviction reversals, shining a light on the recent overturned ruling in Harvey Weinstein's landmark NYC case. Here's what she said:

Today I want to talk about reversing convictions, and more specifically I want to talk to you about how impossible it is to reverse mine. It’s impossible to reverse my conviction that survivors matter. It is impossible to reverse my conviction that what happens to us matters, and that our society must respond to survivors with a more a compassionate, holistically, deeper, and more nuanced understanding of what healing means.

It is impossible to reverse my conviction that after a trauma, survivors can reclaim lives of hope, of possibility, of audacious risk, beautiful intimacy, and glorious, glorious abundant joy. And I stand before you as evidence of that statement.

It is impossible to reverse my conviction that we must listen to survivors as experts on what justice means. It is extraordinary how little their voices are consulted, let alone incorporated, in the process of deciding how to repair harm. Justice is not a one-size-fits-all journey.

It is impossible to reverse my conviction that patriarchal impunity has to end. Patriarchal impunity is when a male-dominated system exempts perpetrators from punishment. Studies show that only 20% of all rape cases in the U.S. are reported to the police, and that between 5 and 0% of all rapes result in a guilty plea or a conviction. So why do 80% of victims not report? Because they're met with a system that grants impunity to perpetrators; a system that blames victims; a system that accepts only those victims who are experienced as "real" rape; a system that completely misunderstands the neurobiology of trauma, which causes behavior in women that doesn't fit the picture of how a "real victim" would act.

Is that change needed that victims should just pull themselves together? Just buck up and report anyway? No. No, it's the system that receives them that needs to change

It is impossible to reverse my conviction — and the conviction of my extraordinary team, The Joyful Heart — that the backlog of untested rape kits can be brought to zero; that the testing of all new kits must be mandated; that we need a statewide kit tracking system; and that survivors have the right to access the status of their kits.

It is impossible to reverse my conviction that grammar — yes, grammar — that we use when we speak about rape must change. In the sentence, "A woman is raped," there's a crime and there's a victim, but there's no perpetrator. Where's the perpetrator? Where is he? Statistically, as we know, most likely he's walking free. He's so free that he doesn't even appear in the language about the crime that he committed. Is that not extraordinary? It's extraordinary that in the very grammar, the perpetrator goes free. Reintroducing perpetrators in the language of rape will make some very unwieldy grammar, but that's the nature of change. It's unwieldy, it's messy, it's uncomfortable, but it's necessary.

Image via NBC Universal

Hargitay continued on in her prolific speech to describe that rape shouldn't be considered a "crime of passion" because it's "not simply the next step in the trajectory of his passion" when a man takes a consensual hookup too far and assaults a woman against her will. She stated that it's "an exercise of power," doubling down that the language we use is important.

The speech went on to address that rape is both about power and control, as a "construct" that was "built, and assembled, and reinforced over time." She noted that there are people with these positions of power — and she specifically called out those in the entertainment industry — that could make a difference and aligned themselves to victims and survivors.

After this and some other remarks, Hargitay specifically called out the Weinstein conviction reversal. She said:

I do want to say something about the Harvey Weinstein conviction, specifically about the reason that it was overturned: too many women's voices. Too many women's voices were allowed to speak. Hallelujah! Amen! I can't imagine anything more beautiful than that. The Daily podcast episode talked about how it was so risky for the prosecution to have that many women testify. Risky to let women speak? You're damn right it is!

Too many women speaking brings change. Too many women speaking shakes the establishment. Too many women means we get listened to more, and people might actually hear what we have to say. Look what happened when women started saying just two words, right? Me too — just as an example — a tidal wave of change. Me too.

And then of course, there was the response: the Me Too Movement. The backlash. The examination of whether the changes that have come are lasting, or are even positive. Of course there's a backlash! What did they expect? For women to speak repeatedly, loudly, together, with a purpose — for there to be no backlash? The backlash is evidence of how powerful those voices were, how powerful those voices ARE.

Watch Mariska Hargitay's Full Speech Here

www.youtube.com

Mariska Hargitay's Gets Emotional as She Thanks Her Support System and the Women Around Her

Turns out that your TV heroes really can be your IRL heroes after all. Long live Olivia Benson! Long live Mariska Hargitay!

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After Emily in Paris season 3 dropped on Netflix in December of 2022, we were hoping to get the fourth installment of the hit show in 2023. But production halted when the WGA writers' strike, then the SAG-AFTRA actors' strike went to affect, and our beloved cast and crew campaigned for better wages and industry protection. But with the end of the writers' strike, and new SAG negotiations, Emily in Paris season 4 finally began production in February 2024 — and I can already tell you there's sure to be plenty of drama and French fashion this time around.

Not only will we see Emily in Paris (see what I did there?!) but she's also pulling an Audrey Hepburn and taking a little Roman Holiday. That's right — our favorite Parisians are heading to Italy! If that doesn't sound like a dreamy comfort show then I don't know what does. Here's everything we know about the upcoming season of your favorite TV brain candy!!

Is Emily in Paris season 4 coming soon?

Image via Lily Collins/Instagram

Via Variety, Emily in Paris season 4 began production in Paris the week of January 15! "Did someone say Saison Quatre?!" Lily Collins says in her Instagram post announcing production. "Finally reunited with my @emilyinparis fam back in Paris and it feels so good. Although, I may need to brush up on my selfie skills for Emily’s sake…"

Now the wait is over! According to the official announcementfor Emily in Paris, we know part one drops on Netflix August 15, followed by part 2 on September 12. I've been impatiently waiting for this considering we didn't know how filming would be impacted by things like the WGA writers strike!

Is Emily in Paris filmed in Paris?

Image via Lily Collins/Instagram

Yes, Emily in Paris is filmed on location in Paris! We got our first look at Emily in Paris season 4 when Lily Collins and Ashley Park were seen filming in the City of Love (via Daily Mail). The costumes for the series are still as bold and bright as ever, with Ashley's Mindy wearing cobalt and metallic boots, and Lily's Emily dressed head-to-toe in lemon yellow. I can't wait to see what these best friends get up to this season! Check out our Paris travel recommendations to live out your own Emily in Paris dreams ;).

On April 27, Lily Collins confirmed Emily in Paris season 4 had wrapped its France shoot and that the cast & crew have swapped the City of Love for the Eternal City! "When you’re the first ones on the dance floor at the Paris wrap party. Next stop: Rome!" she says on Instagram. Late spring is literally the perfect time to film in Italy and I just know this season is going to give me more wanderlust than ever before. I need gelato!

What's Emily In Paris season 4 about?

Image via Netflix

Season 3 left us with a huge cliffhanger: Alfie breaks up with Emily, Camille learns she's pregnant with Gabriel's baby, Benoit's "Mon Soleil" has been chosen for the Eurovision Song Contest, and Emily and Gabriel realize they've been in love with each other the whole time. Whew.

Emily in Paris season 4 will have a ton of cliffhangers to bring full circle, and a bunch of damage that all the characters need to heal. We know from the Netflix TUDUM fan event that we might also see Emily have to deal with an ultimatum head-on, as well as an unexpected twist. Plus, it looks like she's heading on a "Roman holiday," according to lead actress Lily Collins. We'll take any nod to an Audrey Hepburn movie, please and thank you!

Is Alfie coming back in season 4 of Emily in Paris?

Image via Netflix

We don't have OFFICIAL word on whether Alfie (played by Lucien Laviscount) will return for Emily in Paris season 4, but we're hoping for his sake that he gets some closure. Lucien wants to come back as well! "[The dream is] to keep this gravy train going and just to kind of really live in this world a little bit longer," he says in an interview with Elle. " The writers on the show and the creators behind it and everyone that comes into contact with it is so amazing and fantastic. Their minds [have] way, way, way, way surpassed mine. So, yeah. I’ll let them do their thing.”

Who else is in the Emily in Paris season 4 cast?

Image via Netflix

We can expect the rest of the cast — Lily Collins as Emily, Lucas Bravo as Gabriel, Ashley Park as Mindy, Camille Razat as Camille, Philippine Leroy-Beaulieu as Sylvie, Samuel Arnold as Julian, and Bruno Gouery as Luc — to return.

Will there be a season 5 of Emily in Paris?

Image via Marie Etchegoyen/Netflix

It looks like Emily in Paris season 4 will not be the final season, according to creator Darren Star. “There’s a lot more story to tell here and we’re not wrapping things up anytime soon,” Star tells Elle. “And also hopefully season four isn’t the end either. I feel like we’re all creatively feeling like we’re in the middle of something not heading towards the end.”

Darren also told Deadline season 4 is "not necessarily conceived as a final chapter. I think like every other show, it’s a rich ensemble. There’s no end in sight until everybody feels like it’s time to end. And I don’t think this show is limited by a number of seasons, I think it’s limited by everybody’s enthusiasm and excitement about doing it and telling stories about these characters."

We'll take as many seasons of Emily in Paris as they'll give us!!

What has the cast said about Emily in Paris season 4?

Image via Marie Etchegoyen/Netflix

Lucas Bravo told People he's excited for a coming-of-age for Gabriel. "When you start a character, then there's a year where you experience the world and you mature, you become another person and you come back and it's exactly the day you left off," he says. "I'm happy that in season four I'll be able to bring more of what I became and what I've experienced in the past four years."

Even though Lily Collins is now an executive producer, she doesn't want to know TOO much about the future of the show. “Darren and I speak, on occasion, about where he’s thinking of going, but he also doesn’t wanna spoil too much for me because there is a fine line,” she tells Collider. “I don’t wanna know everything because I want to be led with the writing, but I am also curious because, as a producer wanting to celebrate the other characters, I’m very curious to see what their trajectories are."

What happened at the end of Emily in Paris season 3?

Image via Netflix

To be fully prepared for Emily in Paris season 4, it's important to remember just what happened during season 3! The junior season was a bumpy ride for Emily, and it ends with the craziest finale yet. After Camille and Gabriel decide to get married, Camille stops the wedding, saying she knows Gabriel is in love with Emily instead of her. This declaration leads Alfie to break up with our leading lady because he refuses to be her second choice (and honestly, I respect it). That's not the only shocker because Camille also reveals that she's pregnant with Gabriel's child, which comes as a surprise to everyone. Meanwhile, Mindy learns Benoit has submitted a song (specifically "Mon Soleil") to the Eurovision Song Contest and Laurent has his heart set on opening a club in Paris.

Are you excited for Emily in Paris Season 4? Give us your craziest theory in the comments, and check out our Facebook for more pop culture news. Read up on how This Emily In Paris Theory Could Be Why Emily And Gabriel Aren’t Together (Yet).

Lead image via Netflix.

This post has been updated.

We all have big feelings. And thanks to social media and rising levels of anxiety, those feelings, well, feel bigger than ever. That’s exactly where resources like Wondermind come in. The self-proclaimed “mental health ecosystem” is all about exploring, discussing, and navigating our emotions together. This Mental Health Awareness Month, Wondermind wants you to live your mental health journey in community because Mandy Teefey, who co-founded the company with daughter Selena Gomez, knows what it’s like to walk that journey alone.

Image via Wondermind

“As I went through a very long journey of finding I did have a mental health diagnosis — and then I was misdiagnosed and then I had to go through that — I was blessed to have the resources to do that,” Teefey, who received an ADHD and trauma diagnosis after a 20-year bipolar misdiagnosis, says. “Whenever I started my journey of discovering what mental condition I had…I didn't have anybody to lean into or explain the way I was feeling.”

While these personal experiences helped Teefey better understand mental health, it wasn’t until she produced Netflix’s 2017 series 13 Reasons Whythat she saw just how far the mental health conversation goes. The hit show went viral almost as soon as it aired because of its realistic depiction of mental health and all the aftershocks of trauma.

“After we did 13 Reasons Why and saw the reaction and the need for that support, me and Selena were trying to really figure out what could be next,” Teefey says. “Everybody was releasing things [at] different times. It's like you have to have 12 apps to have a program, and then remember to use them all. So that's when we decided to create a mental fitness ecosystem. So it's all-encompassing, but there's something for everyone.”

“We're not a medicinal company [but] we do have an advisory committee that oversees everything that we do,” Teefey continues. “We're technically not doctors, but we are for everyone when it comes to feelings. Everybody has feelings and they can go to our content hub and just kind of explore that for a while.”

Image via Brit + Co

Admittedly, that exploration bit is pretty fun. The articles are inspiring, and the worksheets (which are each created by an expert) are incredibly helpful. Seeing every program, article, and podcast episode feels like an opportunity to start fresh, but once you have all the ideas in front of you, what do you actually do? Teefey recommends journaling, even if it’s just a sentence every day. (She also loves watching journaling videos from Planning Annie: “Anytime I'm feeling sad or like a little unmotivated, I put her on.”)

Journaling every day, even if your entries are short, allows you to track your mood over an extended period of time. If you notice a consistent sadness, for example, it could be a sign it’s time to check in with your doctor. Plus, journaling can help prepare you for the conversations mental health appointments bring up.

“Sometimes if you go into a therapy session and you're not really settled or concrete in who you are and what may be going on, you might go through what I went through, which is being misdiagnosed,” Teefey says. “It's more important for you to know who you are and what you need prior to going in. So you can give that to them instead of them guessing and working around that process with you.”

Image via Brit + Co

Establishing a consistent routine can help decrease your stress, whether you’re eating the same breakfast every day, or you stick to a tried and true skincare regimen like Sydney Sweeney’s Cassie does on Euphoria. I immediately thought of this teen drama when Mandy Teefey mentioned how important her 4 a.m. routine is. But while Cassie spends time doing her skincare and makeup, Teefey spends time nurturing her soul.

“If I don't have [that routine], I'm usually really off kilter,” she says. “So I get up at 4 when everyone's still asleep, and I found that time could be about me, and I'm not taking it away from anybody. And so that's really what helped me be more grounded throughout the day.”

I can attest that my own quiet time in the morning is vital for a successful day — as is knowing what my boundaries need to be. Because honestly, boundaries can change daily! Teefey and I both acknowledge we have to stay away from sad music to protect our mental health, and she also recommends staying off social media when you feel your mental health struggling.

“I can go three days without looking at social media and then when I go on there, I start having anxiety because I'm like, ‘Oh my gosh, I haven't liked this person. I haven't even liked our own pictures [for] Wondermind.’ And then I start feeling guilty,” she says. “There's just some kind of [expectation] to do social media and you really don't. Not everybody needs to know everything, you know? There's beauty in privacy.”

Even Selena Gomez admitted at the 2024 Time100 Summit that taking time off Instagram "was the most rewarding gift I gave myself."

Image via Brit + Co

The idea of staying off social media is way easier said than done (speaking from first hand experience here). If you feel like you’re drowning in engagement announcements, anxiety-inducing news, and FOMO, Teefey recommends keeping tabs on your reactions to gauge when it’s time to take a serious break.

“If it invokes any emotion that is a negative emotion, I [know] it's not worth being angry about, it's not worth losing sleep about,” she says. “It just feels like there's an unintentional taunting on social media and, ‘Wait a minute, is that about me?’ You don't know this person and then you start running with all this stuff in your mind.”

Like every area of life, social media is all about balance, and if you’re looking to unplug while still staying informed, Mandy Teefey recommends bringing a journal with you when doing your morning news scroll — that way, you can process emotions while keeping tabs on what’s happening. “If anything evokes emotion, I'm meditating during the quiet time,” she says.

Studies have found journaling can help decrease your anxiety, and that it can help you break obsessive thought cycles. And while you’re the only one who can process your thoughts and emotions, it’s important not to isolate yourself from your community — especially when you’re struggling. “You gotta build trust and you gotta build the boundary of who you volunteer [your] help to,” she says.

When it comes to her own daughters, Mandy Teefey knows it’s a process. “You have to work with them and meet them where they're at, and then see the help they need and don't assume [they’re going through] what you went through,” she says. “You've got to really understand them to be able to give that advice.”

Image via Natalie Rhea

In her own life, Mandy Teefey got to experience building that trust first-hand with Selena Gomez! “One time it was very, very cold in California and me and Selena were on the opposite sides of the pool,” she says. “We were in sweats and she says, ‘Do you trust me?’ And I went, ‘Yeah.’ And she goes ‘Okay, if you trust me, on three, we're gonna jump in this ice cold pool.’”

While Teefey wasn’t convinced, she trusted Gomez, and they both ended up in the freezing cold water! Which is both a funny story and a fond memory: “We couldn't get out of the pool because [our clothes were] so heavy. It was madness!”

“There's a lot of things I know my daughters don't tell me and that's their right,” she continues. “It's so sensitive between teenagers — especially teenagers — and their parents. They're going through that phase and they don't want to be around them and they don't wanna tell them things. It's definitely not easy but maybe put some feelers out there and just make sure that they know you're there and make it okay to have these conversations.”

Thanks to all this actionable advice, we know that Mental Health Awareness month isn’t limited to TikTok videos or Instagram posts we can reshare. There are real tips we can use to take care of ourselves — and a place to go when we need a boost.

Watch Our Full Interview With Mandy Teefey Here!

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Wondermind Co-Founder Mandy Teefey Helps Us Navigate Big Feelings For Mental Health Awareness Month

If you're struggling with your mental health, check in with your doctor or check out the mental health resources Wondermind offers. You can also use Psychology Today to find a therapist near you.

Lead image via Getty