Kelly Clarkson Shares Heartbreaking Struggles With Body Image: “I Was Miserable”

She has become one of the most famous voices since winning the first season of American Idol back in 2002, but it wasn’t all praise and success for Kelly Clarkson. The 35-year-old has talked openly about the body shaming she’s faced before, but, in an interview, Clarkson opened up about the darker side of fame.
“When I was really skinny, I wanted to kill myself,” the “Love So Soft” singer told Attitude magazine. “I was miserable, like inside and out, for four years of my life. But no one cared, because aesthetically you make sense.”
Clarkson added, “It was a very dark time for me. I thought the only way out was quitting. I like wrecked my knees and my feet because all I would do is put in headphones and run. I was at the gym all the time.”
However, later, “The Heartbeat Song” singer clarified that her comments about her unhappiness had nothing to do with pressures to be thin.
Just to clear something up. I wasn’t ever miserable because I had to be thin. I said I was miserable & as a result I became thin. https://t.co/N1uhyOWqMb
— Kelly Clarkson (@kelly_clarkson) October 24, 2017
Instead, because she conformed to industry standards, her thinness masked her depression because people assumed that because she looked healthy, she was okay.
NOT TRUEI’ve never contemplated suicide because of my weight.I said people had no idea I was unhappy oddly enough because I appeared healthy https://t.co/Ddvumlrk5b
— Kelly Clarkson (@kelly_clarkson) October 24, 2017
It wasn’t until around 2007 when she released her third album, My December, that Clarkson started to take control of her career and begin the journey to true happiness. “There’s a song on My December called ‘Sober.’ There’s this line ‘picked the weeds but kept the flowers’ and I just live my life by that because you are who you surround yourself with,” she told Attitude. “I was around some really negative people, and I got out of it because I had a lot of great people there too. It was a case of turning around, facing them and walking toward the light.”
In the years since, Clarkson has continued to create music and also a beautiful family with husband Brandon Blackstock. The couple share two children and she’s also a proud stepmom to Blackstock’s two children from a previous marriage.
These days, she’s an absolute champion of body positivity. In 2016, she told Redbook, “I think it’s important to tell girls that Photoshop is not reality, that’s not what we look like, that’s not what we want people to see,” she said. “This [her body] is real, and this is what’s happening right now, this is what I’m rocking… if I’m skinny one day or bigger one day, that ain’t gonna change how I sound. I still sound pretty dang good. And my talent is why I’m here.”
What do you think about Kelly Clarkson’s stories about trying to stay thin? Let us know @BritandCo!
(Photos via Kevin Winter; Scott Gries; Cindy Ord; Frazer Harrison/Getty)
Back in January, we introduced you to a feel-good cause to inspire your New Year's resolution: a walking challenge to help raise funds for the amazing cancer fighters at The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. I took part in the challenge with the Brit + Co team and ended up walking 105+ miles in January — it was awesome.
This spring, there's a new challenge on the horizon, The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society's Big Climb. The ask: On May 15, 2021, you can step up to take cancer down by committing to climb 1,311 steps, walking 3.2 miles, or doing 440 chair step-ups at home as part of the Big Climb. If you need some motivation to bring movement back into your daily routine — look no further!
As always, it's free to sign up, but climbers are encouraged to set a fundraising goal to help beat cancer. We'll be organizing another Brit + Co team to step up, and I hope you'll join us too! Keep scrolling for a peek at where I'll be completing the challenge in my Los Angeles neighborhood around the hidden Silver Lake Stairs. Happy climbing!
Never underestimate the power of an accountability buddy! I asked my in-laws, my partner, and a few friends to join me so we can keep each other motivated and accountable in completing the challenge — virtual high-fives all around! Also, my dog Fox is a great climber, too.
An aesthetically pleasing backdrop is a huge motivator for me! I'm fortunate to have all sorts of painted steps around my neighborhood to keep the challenge interesting, but you can also keep cool inside with at-home chair step-ups.
Don't forget to share your progress on social — #BigClimb!
Feel free to break the challenge up if you need to by tackling half the distance in the AM and half at sunset. Here's me 1,311 steps later and ready for a break — but, think I earned this one!
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