The Unfair Thing That Happens to Mixed-Weight Couples
It’s not exactly news that not everyone is going to think your S.O. is as perfect for you as you do. Your friends might actually hate your boyfriend, and that “nightmare in-law” stereotype (sometimes) exists for a reason. But when everyone on the street is looking at you and bae like, “Obviously this is an ‘opposites attract’ situation,” that really doesn’t feel great. Interracial couples, unfortunately, have tons of experience with this (even in 2016 — remember the gross backlash over that Cheerios ad?). But a new study finds that mixed-weight couples experience significant discrimination in their own right.
In a report called Date Someone Your Own Size, psychologists performed a series of studies to determine if there was real prejudice toward relationships where the partners had significant differences in BMI. The findings are pretty unsettling, no matter your weight or relationship status.
For the first study, they asked people to simply rate how favorable they felt about mixed-weight couples and same-size couples — and the mixed-weight couples overwhelmingly scored lower. It didn’t matter whether the man or woman had a high BMI in the mixed weight couple (they didn’t like them no matter what. UGH).
In the second study, participants matched up potential relationship partners on the basis of weight and other factors that were similar to what you might find on a dating app — and mixed-weight couples were categorized as “poor matches.” (Um, we’ve been on Tinder — there are plenty of more important ways someone can be a “poor match.”)
In the third study, the researchers asked participants to give dating advice to someone dating a mixed-weight partner — and they were told to go on less active, public and expensive dates, plus be less physically affectionate and delay introducing their partner to friends and family. Basically, they were saying, “Be embarrassed about your relationship, and hide it from people.” Wow — great advice, jerks!
In the fourth study, researchers tried to determine why there’s so much negativity toward mixed-weight relationships. They theorized that it could be that people are just prejudiced against couples who are different from one another, whether it’s age, race or class; that people find it “unfair” when one member of a couple is less attractive; or that couples who have the same weight are more conventional, and make people more comfortable. A new group (separate from the original studies) was surveyed, and while answers varied, the first theory (different in any way = bad) seemed to prevail.
So… at least they’re equal-opportunity haters? Look, we’re trying to find a bright side here, but let’s just be honest: This sucks. The whole world basically thinking “You two don’t belong together” is a lot of stress to put on a couple. And the study’s authors note that more research is needed to look at how that kind of prejudice affects mixed-weight couples long-term. So if you’re part of a mixed-weight couple, hang in there — and eff the haters.
Tell us how you keep size prejudice and negativity from affecting your relationship by tweeting your tips @BritandCo.
(Photos via Getty)
Pocket doors are so delightful in and of themselves. They appear when you need them, get tucked away when you don't, and make it easy to define rooms while keeping an open floor plan. Add to the pocket door a joyful patterned wallpaper surprise, and you will be sent right into fits of visual jubilation! Or something ;) Today we're sharing two simple and impactful pocket door makeovers that zhuzh up your space in a jiffy.
Anjelika Temple here, co-founder of Brit + Co and proud owner of several pocket doors! When I moved into my first real grown-up house a couple years ago, I knew I wanted to incorporate wallpaper so reached out to our friends at Chasing Paper to see how we might collaborate. It felt like a total lightbulb moment when I realized I could create a surprise pop of pattern on a couple sets of pocket doors.
Not only is it a whimsical way to bring color into a space, but the doors double as picture-perfect backdrops for all your SFH (selfies from home, obvs).
A few pro tips about install:
- Removable wallpaper is miraculously forgiving! You can take it on and off multiple times without it losing integrity (or mucking up your surface).
- I ordered this adhesive wallpaper installation kit with a squeegee and xacto knife and it worked super well. I also recommend a sharp pair of scissors for cutting longer lines.
- This is a two-person job! Get a friend, put on a playlist, and get ready to bond.
- Wild, organic patterns like Tally are great because it's challenging to spot any imperfections in pattern alignment; keep pattern choice in mind if you've got a lot of corners to match up. More geometric patterns and larger shapes leave less room for error (but are awesome in their own right!).
BATHROOM POCKET DOORS
In our primary bathroom, we chose the wallpaper pattern Tally, designed by Kelly Ventura, in White and Navy. In our space, the navy reads as a soft black, which is perfect for the space. It's easy to combine an ever-rotating collection of linens with the Tally pattern.
I love how the white trim becomes the perfect frame around this pocket door piece of art.
My favorite moment in this space is the fact that you actually get a third pop of pattern thanks to our serendipitously placed mirror!
And yes, this one works pretty darn well as a backdrop too ;)
LIVING ROOM DOUBLE DOORS
This set of doors is definitely a focal point of our home. It separates our living room from our primary bedroom which opens onto our backyard. The doors are pretty much always open, but when they're closed we wanted to evoke a fun, nature-inspired vibe. With that in mind, we selected the Lines and Moons pattern by Thimblepress in Green and Brown.
Earth mama vibes up in here! I love how the shapes and colors echo the ferns you see through the windows and the acorn wood details throughout the house.
Love this pattern moment, and xacto-ing out the door handle is def on the oddly satisfying DIY list.
For a pattern lover like me, I love that now I have this instant photo backdrop!
Thanks to Chasing Paper for providing these rolls of pure pattern amazingness. Head to chasingpaper.com to find our own favorites and start adding patterns to your home!
(Wallpaper wingwoman: Kayla Haykin; Photography: Kurt Andre)