5 Ways to Deal When You’re Dating a Mama’s Boy

Problematic Message: Love is the most exciting when it’s forbidden.

Even if you haven’t seen the romantic comedy, you’ve definitely seen the GIFs: Andrew Lincoln, playing Mark, professing his love for Keira Knightley’s character through handwritten signs, one of which reads the famous line, “To me, you are perfect.” Yes, it’s ultra-romantic — until you look a little closer. “Although we all love an honest display of love, making a play and expressing your love for your best friend’s wife is not a good start for a relationship, on or off screen,” Tcharkhoutian says.

And the most harmful part of these fictional narratives is that they only show a fraction, if any, of the fallout. “This is a toxic dynamic that devalues the dignity of marriage and romanticizes the idea of being in love with someone who is ‘off-limits,’ without portraying the harsh realities of this kind of basis for a relationship,” Tcharkhoutian explains.

Problematic Message: A relationship that began with ulterior motives can become healthy and functional.

There’s no denying that Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey are a dreamy pair, but in this movie, their relationship is a nightmare. Their quick rise to love is certainly entertaining, but the foundation of their relationship makes it impossible to exist outside of fiction.

The two meet as means to prove themselves at their respective jobs, and in true rom-com fashion, their supposedly real feelings take off from there. Tcharkhoutian cautions against this behavior in real life. “This can set up a relationship to be something in which a person is objectified as a vehicle to help you meet your needs, instead of a mutual union and partnership with pure and honest motives of loving each other through thick and thin,” she says.

Lucy and Jack in "While You Were Sleeping"

Problematic Message: Falling in love with the idea of someone can result in a happy ending.

No one can resist a Sandra Bullock romantic comedy, so it’s no surprise this movie is still revered as a classic of the genre. It has all the necessary components: an unrealistic plot (she saves a man’s life, is confused for his fiancée by his family, and then falls in love with his brother while he’s in a coma — like, come on!), a handsome boy-next-door lead and, of course, love. However, much like the relationship in How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, the foundation is faulty.

Falling in love with the idea of someone, as Sandra Bullock’s character does, doesn’t equate to falling in love with the actual person, Tcharkhoutian clarifies, and to start a relationship with this basis in real life is ill-advised.

Problematic Message: True love lies in the next adventure, which is far from your hometown and your past relationship.

Who hasn’t dreamt of traveling to a foreign country; staying in a cozy, remote cottage; and falling in love with someone even half as good-looking as Jude Law? Well, there’s a reason it’s a mere fantasy. Tcharkhoutian describes the phenomenon in The Holiday movie as escapism — the idea that you need to escape from your day-to-day life to find true happiness or, in this case, true love.

Although it’s fun to dream, if taken too far, this particular romantic comedy mentality can lead to irrational expectations. “This escapism mentality can create a false belief that international [relationships] are sustainable in the long-term,” Tcharkhoutian remarks. “True healthy relationships survive and thrive in the everyday, mundane routine, not in the exciting international adventure that depends on thrill and distance.”

Which rom-com couples stay together?

However, there are PLENTY of romantic comedy relationships we love! Some of our favorites include Nick and Rachel in Crazy Rich Asians, Matty and Jenna in 13 Going on 30, Harry and Sally in Meg Ryan's When Harry Met Sally, Elle and Emmett in Legally Blonde, and Peter and Lara Jean in To All The Boys I've Loved Before.

This power couple is quite literally on top of the world right now, and I feel like I'm watching a rom-com IRL. Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce made their relationship public in September of 2023, and it definitely feels like invisible string theory.

The Hollywood power duo met in 2010 on the set of Green Lantern and they married soon after in 2012. Today, Blake and Ryan share four daughters.

Barack Obama and Michelle Obama

The former POTUS and FLOTUS met back in 1989, when Michelle was assigned as Barack's mentor at their law firm. Reportedly, Barack (then 28) was instantly smitten with Michelle (then 25), and they began dating shortly after. The couple was married in 1992, eventually welcoming daughters Sasha and Malia.

This private couple met on the set of The Place Beyond the Pines in 2011 and today have two daughters together. Eva and Ryan are so private, in fact, that news of their marriage only came to light in 2022 following the reveal of Eva’s newest tattoo, which reads “de Gosling.”

George and Amal were introduced by a mutual friend at a 2013 dinner party in Lake Como. After a few months, the couple went on their first date, and were engaged within a year. The pair wed in 2014 and have since welcomed twins.

Emily Blunt and John Krasinski

The A Quiet Place costars initially met in 2008, tying the knot in an Italian ceremony in 2010. The actors are parents to two daughters, Hazel and Violet. Our favorite fact about them? John’s seen in The Devil Wears Prada 72 times.

If there's any couple that makes me believe in falling in love with your best friend, it's Tom Holland and Zendaya. The two actors met while making Spider-Man: Homecoming, and the rest is history.

David Beckham and Victoria Beckham

The Beckhams met in 1997 and were married by 1999. Today they have four children together: Brooklyn, Romeo, Cruz and Harper.

While the timeline of their romantic relationship is unknown, the singers have been friends for well over a decade. They officially confirmed their relationship in 2020, and as of 2023 are reportedly married. The pair share one son and are expecting a second child by August.

Serena Williams and Alexis Ohanian

The tennis legend and Reddit co-founder met by chance when they both sat down next to each other during breakfast at the Cavalieri Hotel in Rome back in 2015. They hit it off and were married in 2017, welcoming their daughter Olympia shortly after.

Emma Stone met her husband Dave McCary when she hosted Saturday Night Live in 2016. They were married by 2020 and now have a baby girl together named Louise Jean McCary!

Hayley Kiyoko and Becca Tilley

The pop singer and two-time Bachelor contestant have been together for five years, and confirmed their relationship in 2022.

Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban

The Australian actor and New Zealand singer met at the G’Day USA gala in 2005 and got married in 2006. Today, the duo are parents to two daughters, Sunday Rose and Faith Margaret, in addition to Nicole’s two children with former beau Tom Cruise.

Viola Davis and Julius Tennon

The How To Get Away With Murder actress has been married to her husband Julius since 2003.

Gabrielle Union and Dwyane Wade

According to Dwayne, the two met at a 2007 Super Bowl party which they were both asked to co-host. Although it wasn’t love at first sight, the couple eventually married in 2014. They share one daughter, in addition to three children from Dwayne’s previous relationship.

Oprah Winfrey and Stedman Graham

Oprah began dating Stedman in 1986, the same year her namesake show launched. After meeting at a charity event, the pair were engaged in 1992, but decided against marriage.

This celebrity couple reportedly began dating in 2018, and (after totally slaying the Met Gala red carpet), they learned they were expecting their first child in 2023!

Alicia Keys and Swizz Beatz

The singer and producer have known each other since they were teenagers, but didn't enter a relationship with each other until 2008, with Swiss proposing in 2009. The couple married in 2010 and they have two sons named Egypt and Genesis together.

Cindy Crawford and Rande Gerber

The supermodel married the businessman and former model in 1998. They have two children together, Kaia and Presley — both of whom are successful models too.

Matthew McConaughey and Camila Alves

After six years of dating, the couple married in 2012 in Texas. Today, the model and actor have three children together.

While this celebrity couple met in 2017, they didn't become an item until 2021. And we're *very* excited to see them tie the knot soon. Good things come to those who wait!

Chrissy Teigen and John Legend

The fan favorite couple met in 2007 on the set of his music video and married in 2013. They share four children, welcoming their youngest via surrogate earlier this month.

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka

Neil and David started dating in 2004 and married in 2014. The couple became fathers to twins, Harper and Gideon, in 2010.

TheO.C. and Gossip Girl alumni are believed to have met in 2010 while starring in romantic comedy The Oranges. They married in 2014 and have a daughter and a son.

Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck

Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck *totally* make me believe in fate. After breaking off their engagement in 2023, the celebrity couple finally got married in 2022. I'm not crying, you are!

Kevin Jonas and Danielle Jonas

The eldest Jonas brother Kevin married Danielle in 2009 after two years of dating. The couple has two daughters, Alena and Valentina, and are very close to the rest of Kevin’s family., Danielle’s regularly seen backstage and in videos with her “Jonas sisters,” Priyanka Chopra (married to Nick Jonas) and Sophie Turner (married to Joe Jonas).

Judd Apatow and Leslie Mann

The comedic director and actress have been together since 1996, and have been married since marrying in 1997. The couple regularly work together on films and have two children, Maude and Iris. Maude is following in her parent's footsteps, having had a breakout role in the hit MAX teen drama Euphoria.

After getting married in 2022, Kourtney Kardashian just gave birth to her and Travis Barker's son, Rocky Thirteen Barker, in December 2023. Congrats to the happy family!

Julia Roberts and Daniel Mode

Julia and Daniel married in 2002 after meeting during the filming of The Mexican, where Julia starred alongside Brad Pitt. They have three children together, now 18 (twins) and 16.

It appears Chris Martin and Dakota Johnson have been together since 2017 (which means he probably has the real inside scoop on that iconic Architectural Digest house tour), and they might be tying the knot very soon!

Denzel Washington and Pauletta Washington

The actors have been married for a whopping 37 years after tying the knot in 1983. They renewed their vows in 1995, and are parents to four children, John David, Malcolm, Olivia and Katia.

Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell

The couple have been together for 40(!!!) years, ever since 1983. While they never married, they share one son, Wyatt Russell. Goldie also has two children, Kate Hudson (yes, THE Kate Hudson) and Oliver Hudson, whom she shares with her second husband, Bill Hudson.

Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick

SJP and Matthew had a surprise wedding in 1997 after meeting on the New York theater scene in 1991. The pair have three children together, James Wilkie and twin daughters Marion Loretta and Tabitha Hodge.

Elton John and David Furnish

The world renowned musician and Furnish met in 1993 and were one of the first same-sex couples to enter a civil partnership (the closest thing to a same-sex marriage at the time) in the UK in 2005. “Officially” marrying in 2014, they share two sons together.

Dua Lipa and Callum Turner

This celebrity couple were first spotted at the beginning of 2024, and I genuinely might have screamed when I found out. Dua Lipa's recent albums are a masterclass in pop music, while Callum Turner automatically makes every TV show and movie he's in better. I can't wait to see what's in store for these two!

What is Taylor Swift's The Tortured Poets Department?

Taylor Swift's new album (which is also referred to as TS11) is called The Tortured Poets Department. Taylor Swift announced the album while accepting the award for Best Pop Album at the 2024 Grammys. While we don't know the exact vibe of the album, over the last year, we've gotten quite a few clues about what we can expect! Just like "Daylight" at the end of Lover sets up Midnights, I think "Dear Reader" sets up The Tortured Poets Department.

Taylor's official announcement features beautiful language that evokes the same emotion "The Lakes" does, which makes me believe TTPD will be similar to Folklore and Evermore (maybe it'll even serve as the third sister album Swifties thought we'd get in 2021?). Some fans are also convinced TTPD connects to Reputation, and TBH, I'm hopping on this train!

"I think the two albums are sisters albums, but in like an opposite way," one Reddit user says. "Reputation is all black, this one is going to be all white and softly coded."

"Reputation is presented as a dark album but is truly a love album," another user comments. "This one is presented as soft and white but I bet the lyrics will be devastating."

I'm expecting TS11 to have the same lyrical prowess as songs like "Would've, Should've, Could've," The National's "The Alcott" (on which Taylor's a featured artist), and "You're Losing Me." Taylor is all about looking past appearances and telling a complex story, and The Tortured Poets Department will be no different. Just like Reputation is an edgy, glittery, emotionally-charged version of the beginning of her relationship with ex-boyfriend Joe Alwyn, I totally agree that TTPD could look grounded, airbrushed, and dreamy from the outside, but the lyrics will be SAD.

There's also been some discussion that TS11 could be another pop album that's even more nuanced than Midnights. Well, during her Eras Tour show in Sydney, Australia she played yet another round of suspicious surprise songs. While sitting at the piano, Taylor Swift takes her earpiece out and calls attention to the keyboard. "Do you hear that?" she says (via TikTok). "My damn keyboard's playing a synth sound." She then does what she almost always does when dropping an Easter egg: she smirks.

"That sound is how the album starts, mark my words," one comment reads. Another says, "That smirk tells me everything I need to know."

When is The Tortured Poets Department release date?

The Tortured Poets Department is dropping April 19, 2024. But on February 16, an artist by the name of Nils Sjöberg posted a song titled "The Tortured Poets Department." You might be wondering, "Why is this noteworthy? Who's Nils?" Nils Sjöberg is the pseudonym Taylor Swift has been using for over 10 years! With the fake name, she's written hits like "This Is What You Came For" by Rihanna, so when the title track of TS11 popped up on Spotify, it didn't take long for Swifties to notice.

The singer's voice sounds like it could be an auto-tuned version of Taylor's, but admittedly, it could also be AI. With the recent advancements in audio AI, some tracks from The Tortured Poets Department have supposedly leaked online, but we'll have to wait until April 19th to hear what the album *actually* sounds like. Either way, Nils' song is a fun one to listen to!

At the Eras Tour shows in Tokyo, Taylor Swift explained when she started working on TTPD. “I’ve been working on Tortured Poets since right after I turned in Midnights,” she said onstage. “So, you turn in an album months in advance…and I’ve been working on it for about two years. I kept working on it throughout the U.S. tour and when it was perfect, in my opinion, when it was good enough for you, I finished it.”

"Soon you'll get to hear it, soon we'll get to experience it together," she continued. "I'm over the moon about the fact that you guys care about my music...Everyone’s like, ‘Why do you make so many albums?’ And I’m like, ‘Man, because I love it! I love it so much! I’m having fun, leave me alone.'”

The brand new album follows Speak Now (Taylor's Version) and 1989 (Taylor's Version). When Midnights was announced after Fearless (Taylor's Version) and Red (Taylor's Version), I wondered whether she'd have a two rerecordings, one new album pattern and it looks like that's what we're getting!

How do I presave The Tortured Poets Department?

Before The Tortured Poets Department's release on at midnight on April 19 (we're less than a month away!), go ahead and pre-save it. It'll make streaming the album a little bit easier because when you pre-save, the album will pop up for you as soon as it drops! Go to Taylor Swift's official website and click on the "Pre-add/Pre-save" button. It'll take you to a new page where you can save it on Spotify or Apple Music (depending on which service you use), and you can also pre-order at stores like Target!

How many songs will be on The Tortured Poets Department?

Taylor Swift dropped The Tortured Poets Department song list February 5, and we already have theories about what each track could reference. IMO, "I Can Do It With A Broken Heart" is totally referencing Taylor Swift's performances of "Lover" following her split from Joe Alwyn (you can see her crying during the set), while there's a good chance "Florida!!!" is referencing her first Tampa concert, which was the first show she performed after the breakup became public knowledge. Taylor Swift's dad Scott Swift recently told fans he's most excited for Swifties to hear the title track and "Florida!!!" Here's the full tracklist for TS11:

1. Fortnight (feat. Post Malone)
2. The Tortured Poets Department
3. My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys
4. Down Bad
5. So Long, London
6. But Daddy I Love Him
7. Fresh Out the Slammer
8. Florida!!! (feat. Florence + The Machine)
9. Guilty as Sin?
10. Who's Afraid of Little Old Me?
11. I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)
12. loml
13. I Can Do It With A Broken Heart
14. The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived
15. The Alchemy
16. Clara Bow
17. Bonus Track: The Manuscript
18. Bonus Track: The Bolter
19. Bonus Track: The Albatross
20. Bonus Track: The Black Dog

Will The Tortured Poets Department be explicit?

There are 7 explicit songs on The Tortured Poets Department: "The Tortured Poets Department," "Down Bad," "But Daddy I Love Him," "Florida!!! (feat. Florence + The Machine)," "loml," "I Can Do It With A Broken Heart," and "The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived."

What is The Albatross about?

During one of her Eras Tour shows in Sydney, Australia, Taylor Swift announced a new version of The Tortured Poets Department featuring exclusive bonus track "The Albatross." This new album already has some crazy track titles — all with pretty noteworthy meanings.

According to Collins Dictionary, if you call someone an Albatross, "they cause you great problems from which you cannot escape, or they prevent you from doing what you want to do," while a Bolter could refer to someone bolting out of a relationship (or bolting from a restaurant to a car like in this viral clip 🤨).

Meanwhile "The Alchemy" refers to the continual process of trying to turn something into gold — remember how Taylor Swift spent 6 years saying her relationship with Joe Alwyn was golden? Buckle up Swifties, TS11 is going to be a wild ride.

What does loml mean?

At first glance, the twelfth song on The Tortured Poets Department, "loml," means "love of my life." Some fans were wondering if the song was a nod to Harry Styles since his Harry's House finale track is "Love of My Life" (the album also features a track named "Daylight" which is another funny connection to Taylor Swift). But Bonnie & Emily from ChatsAndReacts have got me thinking about the track in a whole new way.

Emily says that while Taylor might sing about the love of her life at the beginning of the song, she also has the potential to switch it up each verse. "Lie of my life" and "loss of my life" are HEART WRENCHING, and totally something Taylor would write.

How can I buy The Tortured Poets Department?

You can pre-order a bunch of different versions of The Tortured Poets Department on Taylor Swift's website right now, includingThe Tortured Poets Department CD + Bonus Track "The Manuscript", The Tortured Poets Department CD + Bonus Track "The Manuscript" andThe Tortured Poets Department Cassette + Bonus Track "The Manuscript".

What is a tortured poets department?

Taylor Swift has spent years talking about her anxiety, her sleepless nights, and her emotions. "My muses, acquired like bruises / My talismans and charms / The tick, tick, tick of love bombs / My veins of pitch black ink," she writes in her official Instagram post. "All's fair in love and poetry." My guess is that The Tortured Poets Department features a bunch of artists who all feel very deeply and have a similar ethereal, larger-than-life approach to their music.

As far as the name, it looks like The Tortured Poets Department could be referencing her ex-boyfriend Joe Alwyn's group chat name — "The Tortured Man Club" with Paul Mescal (who starred in Normal People while Joe starred Conversations With Friends. Both series are based on Sally Rooney books).

Will The Tortured Poets Department have any featured artists?

Yes, The Tortured Poets Department will feature Florence + The Machine on the song "Florida!!!" and Post Malone on the song "Fortnight." And after Taylor Swift teased a variety of collaborations by posting handwritten lyrics from artists like Harry Styles and Lorde, Swifties are wondering if The Tortured Poets Department will be the "collab album" we never got.

Another clue that leads me to believe this is true is the fact that the title of this album is so much longer than her other titles — and she refers to herself as "Chairman" of the department. Who are all the constituents?! Are they all the same artists who left Scooter Braun's management last year? Only time will tell, because as far as I'm concerned, surprises aren't out of the question until the TS11 era is over!👀

What is the theory of Taylor Swift's double album?

Throughout her stay in Sydney, Australia for the Eras Tour, Taylor Swift has been dropping lots — and I mean lots — of twos. @v_swiftie_ points out that in addition to holding up the number two while announcing The Tortured Poets Department, she's been playing more surprise song mashups than normal, and Taylor Nation has been posting Instagram stories featuring the number 2 instead of the number 13. Suspicious, Tay, very suspicious.